Gorgeous
by alainnrois
Summary: Spoilers for all Season 1. Post Sacrifice. Cal and Gillian keep beating 'round the bush, neither of them wanting to be the one to break the code. Updated Nov. 19th! Might up the rating following chapter!
1. Chapter 1

It had been an exhausting day. Tired and hungry, Gillian strode into the building, looking around as she walked down the corridors: there was no-one there. Everyone must have left already, she thought to herself, able for just that one second to stop reflecting about the day's events. She had taken a case with Loker, whose radical honesty had not been affected in the least by the consequences of his behaviour in the Hollin case. If anything, and if possible, it seemed to be getting worse every day, and Gillian was starting to get pissed.

The click-clock of her heels against the floor was the only audible sound, and for a moment she felt a little scared. This was also worrying her. Gillian had almost never been afraid of anything, but now, after the Jenkins copycat incident, she found herself startled by the smallest sounds and movements, at any place, at any time of day. She was handling it better as time passed, however some fear still remained, deep inside.

Her mind plagued with thoughts, she finally made it to the office, closing the door behind her and flopping down on the couch. She opened her purse to retrieve the files that she wanted to leave for Cal to check on the following morning, and in the process found something that called her attention. The keys to her old house. Alec's house, now. How come she hadn't given them to him yet? She definitely thought she had done it already… To be completely honest, she still couldn't take it in, the divorce, moving out, being on her own for the first time in a very long time. Although she had started to feel alone even before Alec went back to cocaine.

It was probably a few months after Sophie… Not only had they stopped having sex, but also had stopped talking about serious matters altogether. The conversation would always start the same, lead to the same, and finish the same. Gillian could hear the voices in her head.

"Hi, I'm sorry I'm late… I had to help my boss with a report and got stranded in the office for over two hours", he would say, his brows furrowing, lips tight. He was afraid she would catch him in the lie.

"It's okay, I understand", she would reply with a soft smile, knowing all too well that even if she wasn't a great liar, Alec wouldn't be able to see the hurt in her eyes. He just wasn't that perceptive.

Then it would just go on into a trivial exchange of information, such as: "How was your day?", "It was tiring, but okay, what about yours?", "It was just fine, thanks for asking…". Sometimes, after the uncomfortable silence, Gillian would add: "I made you some supper". But it was useless. If he accepted the offer, he would not let her stay with him, waving her away with a quick: "It's ok, go to sleep, I'll be fine", occasionally throwing in a "babe" or "honey" somewhere in the sentence. But most of the times, his answer came distant and slightly guilty: "Oh, thanks, but I'm worn out. I'm going to bed".

No matter how well she hid it, every night for six months straight, she had hoped for a different answer, a different outcome, secretly knowing that her efforts were in vain; and so every single night she would go to sleep feeling lonely, broken and misunderstood.

Her mind drifted back to Sophie, and the thought caused her stomach to knot. It had been hard on her, but if she had to be true to herself, she knew that it had hit hardest on her relationship with Alec. The struggle of not being able to conceive, and the sudden loss of their child, had undoubtedly taken a toll on them. More than once, Gillian had thought, well, what doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Only in her case, it had not killed her, but she was not exactly convinced that it had made her stronger in any way.

And then she started wondering…What if it had been her weakness, her sadness, that had driven Alec away in the first place? She could not put all the blame on him, since she was well aware of the fact that Sophie's unexpected departure had changed her deeply. But then again, no, she had always tried to keep things going, to keep her head up, to show Alec that she still loved him, and that she wanted them to get through the hardships together. Maybe her husband had seen it differently. Maybe something inside him had changed, too. And she couldn't hold him responsible for that, she knew that better than anyone else.

Gillian sighed, then breathed deeply, and got up from the couch, tossing the keys back into the purse and making a mental note to get rid of them as soon as possible. She grabbed the light blue folder that was on her desk and slid the files inside, scanning over them quickly to make sure everything was in order. The expression in her eyes, however, clearly showed that she was still engrossed in her thoughts of Alec and Sophie and the family that they could've been.

Both physically and mentally crashed, she walked into Lightman's office and was surprised to find him sitting on his recliner, dozed off, tossing his head to one side and the other in his sleep with the computer still on. She smiled genuinely for the first time in the day and, as she watched him sleep and tried to contain the chuckle that threatened to escape her lips, her mind was completely quiet. His presence, even if unconscious, made her feel safer. She approached slowly, taking her time to study his face as it really was when he was not trying to cover up his feelings. Surprisingly, she actually thought him quite handsome, and his muscles being relaxed, he even looked a little vulnerable, sitting there alone, unaware of her presence.

After a minute which seemed an eternity, Gillian brought the vacant chair closer to his and sat down. Then she reached out, quietly touching his hand.

"Cal?" She shook him a little bit and his eyelids fluttered; he looked up with a confused expression and his eyes met hers, then instantly relaxed.

"Hey" he answered hoarsely, cleared his throat and took her hand in his. It felt warm. He must've fallen asleep without realizing, his whole body was aching for a hot bath. His feet felt especially cold.

"What time is it?" he asked, throwing his head backwards and closing his eyes briefly.

"It's a little past eight".

"And why are you still here?" he squeezed her hand and swiveled in his chair, turning to face her with a small smile. He leaned in, propping his head up with his elbows against his knees, and Gillian returned the smile. She freed her hand from Cal's and replied, "I had to bring this to you. Thought you might want to check them out early tomorrow".

"Mm-hmm", Cal received the folder and barely looked through the pages, fixing his gaze on Gillian again and leaving the report on his desk.

"Listen, Emily's at this party at her friend's, whatever her name is, I keep thinking Jessica… No, Jeanie–anyway. I have to pick her up at ten", he ran a hand through his messy hair. "Do you mind if I go to your place til then? I'm afraid I might fall asleep if I go home now".

Gillian laughed and shook her head. "Not a problem". They looked at each other for a moment.

"Okay", said Cal, "Great then. Let's go". He shot up from his chair, grabbing his coat and turning the computer off all at the same time. She loved how he could look so idle one moment, then appear as if he was about to run a marathon the next. She was so amused by her own appreciation of the man that she didn't realise he was already at the door.

"What?" came his voice, his eyes half-closed and intrigued, mouth slightly open. "Come on", he waved at her slightly exasperated. Gillian smiled and quickly said, "It's nothing", then got up and followed him out. They did not speak as they went through the hallway and out of the building. Cal waited with his hands in his pockets until she found her car keys, then looked for his own.

"I'm following you" he said to her as he walked over to his car. He climbed in and watched her until she was safely in hers, too. Something about her was off tonight.

They drove to her apartment, Cal keeping close by so as not to lose track, for he had never been to her new apartment yet. The fact that she was letting him go with her so soon after the divorce, though, reassured him. He figured she was not too depressed to accept company, and that was good. He knew what it was like to feel like staying home and not seeing anyone for weeks.

Finally, Gillian parked her car in front of a huge apartment building, and signaled for him to do the same; this was her place. Cal turned off the engine and cut his eyes at the monstrous structure hovering above him as he got out of the car. He closed the door and walked onto the sidewalk next to Gillian.

"This thing's got over 50 meters" he said matter of factly.

"I know" she answered with a mocking smile and walked away. Cal followed shortly after.

Soon they were in the elevator and Gillian pressed the button to the last floor. Cal's eyebrows jumped up in surprise, and he put his hands in his pockets. "Looks like you bought yourself a little piece of heaven", he said, obviously referring to the height of the building. But Gillian's expression warned him that it was not the best joke to make, given the circumstances. "Sorry" he offered apologetically. After a short silence, he continued.

"How long does it take to get there anyway?".

"It'll only be a minute, stop whining" she chuckled, waving her hair off her face with the back of her hand. With this movement, her fragrance reached Cal and he shuddered, not displeased, actually quite the contrary, but it took him by surprise and he found himself exhilarated by it. He suddenly felt an urge to pin her against the glass walls of the elevator and kiss her, but he kept himself under control and put the best blank expression he could muster at the moment.

Maybe it was because he was so dizzied by his own arousal that he never acknowledged the fact that they were already up there and the doors of the elevator were opening. He walked beside Gillian, afraid that if he walked behind her her perfume would leave an intoxicating trace and he wouldn't be able to keep composure. She stopped at the door of apartment "C", sighing.

"Well…" she started.

"I bet the C stands for my name" Cal interrupted with a crooked grin. Gillian grabbed the doorknob.

"Always the charmer", she opened the door slightly, "You know I've always wondered how you could be so modest, being as successful as you are" she played along as she let him in. He grinned again and thanked her, waiting as she closed the door behind them, then turned on the lights.

The place was all white. The walls, the curtains, the table, the chairs, even the doors and the lamp were white.

"Are we back at the office?" Cal teased.

"Cut it out", she smacked his shoulder, "The furniture was already here. I haven't brought my stuff in yet, other than my bed and nightstand. This is the previous owner's. She said she wasn't gonna be able to pick it up before next week, and I just wanted to move in as soon as possible, so…" Cal opened his mouth to say something, but Gillian interrupted.

"As for the walls, I'm still thinking what colour I want to paint them", she started walking around the living-room, Cal right behind her. "I think I might leave them white here, since it's a bit small and it will appear to be bigger in daylight… And then maybe green, or blue, for the kitchen… And probably maroon for the bedroom. I haven't decided", she smiled and looked at him again. He studied her face. Her smile was asymmetrical, and it never reached her eyes. She looked away.

"Are you happy?" Cal managed to ask in a low voice. She met his gaze briefly. "With the new place, I mean".

She smiled sadly. "I know what you mean. And, yes, I am… I mean, I've mixed emotions, you know… But, yeah, I guess I'm just waiting for everything to fall into place." He breathed deeply and placed a hand on her shoulder.

"As for the other meaning of your question", she locked her eyes with his, "you already know". Cal felt a lump in his throat as he looked into her watery blue eyes. Her look was so sincere, and there was so much sadness and fear, yet a little bit of hope too. Her eyelids fluttered.

"What is it?" he inquired almost instantly. Gillian swallowed and went over to the couch. She sat with her legs crossed, her gaze fixed on the empty walls of her apartment.

"I've… Today I- Well, it's just, I've been thinking a lot about Sophie lately" she said, her low voice almost a whisper. Cal listened to her respectfully, not wanting to invade her space just yet. After all, she had moved to the other side of the room before she spoke. "I guess it's just this, all of this… I sometimes wonder if maybe it was me that drove him away, you know? Cause I was so devastated back then… I just wish I had more answers sometimes."

He knew she was being honest, and that she was probably not going to say much more. Gillian was too good. She wouldn't want to burden him with her own stuff, especially because there was that line that they had promised themselves not to cross, and it was so thin, so fragile, that one word, if pronounced even slightly out of place, could erase that line, and then everything else would just come crashing down.

The dynamic of their relationship was, at the same time, made interesting by all of these boundaries and unspoken promises. They were like two hurricanes, two forces of nature that could take on everything around them, but there was something between them, stopping them from joining forces, from spiraling into the unknown. They had been close to breaking the code a few times, but one of them had always fallen behind, trying to convince themselves that there was nothing there, that it was better to keep things as they had been for so long.

"Do you want to tell me about it, luv?" he asked as quietly as he could. Gillian sighed, resigned. She opened her mouth to reply, then stopped and looked up at him tearfully. "I'm… No, not really, I just need some company right now. Does that make me a selfish friend?" she asked, a little jokingly in the end. Cal smiled whole-heartedly. "I'm not going anywhere, luv".

Gillian wiped a tear from her cheek and returned the smile. Then she turned her gaze to him again and motioned for him to sit next to her. He hesitated, then she patted the spot beside her again, encouraging him until he started to move. She waited with a coy smile creeping up her lips while he turned off the bright lights and let the faint glow of the moon crawl through the blinds and into the room. There were no curtains.

After this, he sat down and put his hand on the armrest, the other arm hanging loosely beside him. Gillian faced him with a stern expression.

"Thank you, Cal. Seriously".

"I thought you were the one who was doing me a favour tonight" he replied, shrugging it off. Then Gillian scooted in closer and, without doubting it for a second, laid her body against his, resting her head on his shoulder. It felt so right that Cal didn't stop to think about it. He just draped his arm around her shoulders and pulled her slightly closer, brushing her hair behind her ear and kissing the top of her head. Cal mumbled something under his breath, almost to himself, and Gillian kept her eyes closed as she inquired, "Mm-hmm?".

"I was just thinking, this is nice" Cal whispered. Gillian nuzzled into the cave of his neck before she sighed contentedly.

"Mm-hmm".

The light crept onto their faces as time passed , neither of them strong enough to move, to break this silent understanding, and the acknowledgement that they needed each other as much as they needed oxygen.


	2. Chapter 2

**Thanks everyone for your reviews!! They make me happy. Happy Rose, more fic, happy reviewers, more reviews, happy Rose, and so on :)**

**Disclaimers: I absolutely forgot to do this in the first chapter and then it was too late to edit it. I DO NOT OWN the show Lie To Me or any of its characters, as much as I would love to (but then again if I did Cal & Gillian wouldn't be together yet anyway, cause I believe that it should not all be wasted at once ;) Let's keep the suspense!)**

**Chapter II**

"Gill", came the deep, soothing voice, blending into her dream, "wake up, luv".

"No, wait" she moaned, "it's coming, wait…"

"What's coming?" Cal asked with a soft laugh, bemused.

"Shh!" Gillian answered in her sleep, her brow furrowing in annoyance.

"Okay, luv, this is funny, but I need you to open the door for me. I have to pick Emily up".

"Whah?…No, Emily is… Em is… With her friend, Cal stays".

This time he laughed soundly, shaking his head, his chest moving up and down almost rhythmically. The sound of his laughter finished the job and she finally awoke, apparently quite confused as to what had just happened. Cal searched her face, still diverted by her reaction, and stood up.

"What is it?" she asked, blinking several times and adjusting her eyes to the light –or lack thereof.

"You were talking in your sleep. It was actually quite interesting" Cal answered nonchalantly. He shrugged and put his hands in his pockets. Gillian flushed and looked down, suddenly embarrassed.

"Really?" her voice went down a little bit. "What did I say?"

"That something was coming and I shouldn't wake you" Cal smiled, now endeared with her embarrassment. "And that I should stay, but I guess that's just normal"; he turned and walked towards the door, and Foster seized that fraction of a second to let the surprise and desperation show on her face before she followed him to open the door, masking her feelings again.

Cal had shrugged it off as a reaction of being caught talking in her sleep, but Gillian was really worried about having said something inappropriate, especially given the nature of her dream. But then again, if she had accidentally said that, in her dream, Cal was about to kiss her, his reaction would've certainly been different, so she assumed that none of that had slipped.

"Thanks for letting me stay" he told her as he walked out and waited for the elevator. She stood beside him, her arms limp and her knees wobbling due to the draining workday. Cal laughed some more and rubbed her arm.

"Don't fall back into sleep just yet" he teased. She smiled and put a hand on his chest, rubbing it lightly with her thumb.

They stayed that way, looking into each other's eyes, relishing in each other's presence, breathing the same air.

Cal cupped her face in his right hand and gave her a brief smile. "You know you can trust me, right?"

Her body shivered under his touch and she put her own hand over his, grinning slightly.

"I think you know the answer to that".

"Now, luv, I always do".

He felt like pushing her against the wall and devouring her right then and there, but it was not the right thing to do. Cal had been thinking that, lately, the right thing to do always seemed wrong in his mind. Deep inside, he knew that Gillian felt the same way to some extent, but he didn't know just how far she was willing to, or would let herself go.

"I'm-" Gillian started, but just then the elevator arrived and she was pulled from her thoughts. She broke eye contact and since then seemed to escape Cal's gaze. On the other hand, he kept trying to recover the connection, eager to hear what she had been about to say. She rubbed a hand against her neck and Cal's eyebrows shot up in surprise.

"What?" She looked up and licked her lips, then scolded herself mentally for doing that.

"You're anxious, Foster" he said, stating the obvious.

"I'm- no, it's nothing, nevermind. You should go, Cal, Emily's waiting".

She had somehow found the energy to put her mask back up, and he knew instantly that he was not going to get anything out of her, as much as that bothered him. Yet the intrigue made it so much more interesting. What was so embarrassing that Gillian could not tell him after having just said that she trusted him? He didn't want to push, although he knew that even if she got pissed, it wouldn't be long before she forgave him and everything went back to normal. Except he wasn't sure what qualified as normal anymore.

"Alright, then" he put his hands in his pockets again and shrugged. "I'll see you tomorrow. Sleep well, Foster".

She cringed inside when she heard him call her Foster for the second time that night; it was so much warmer when he called her love.

"You, too" was all she managed to get out, sliding her hand down his chest, touching the buttons on it.

All she wanted was to rip his clothes off and go to bed with him, feel him, touch him, hold him, kiss him so much, all over. She wished with all her heart that he did not have to go, that he would cross the line, that there were no lines at all. She could feel the electricity, starting at the tip of her fingers and running through her whole body. There was no fooling her: the chemistry was undeniable. Neither of them could pretend it was not there. Not acting on it, not mentioning it, did not mean that it ceased to exist. And right now, it was coursing through her veins, a fire building up inside of her, almost magically awakening that side of her that had been dormant for so long throughout her relationship with Alec.

It was too soon that Cal moved away from her warm touch, and his whole body seemed to acknowledge this change of state, though he would not show it. "Night" he whispered, leaning in to kiss her temple. She closed her eyes. "Night".

She hated goodbyes.

**

"Hey Dad!" Emily said cheerfully, climbing into the passenger seat. "You look weird" she added unscrupulously as she fastened her seatbelt.

Cal looked at her with a confused expression.

"Huh?"

"Is it Gillian?" she asked, eyes wide open, looking intrigued.

Cal wondered how much exactly his daughter had learnt about reading faces. Nobody seemed to be able to read him, yet Emily almost always knew what he was thinking and how he was feeling. He had to admit she was too much like him in that aspect, maybe too much for her own good. He turned his eyes to the road and drove off Jessica's –that was her name- house.

"How was the party?"

"You're deflecting" Emily responded, also staring at the darkness in front of them. "And it was good. I guess".

The last two words changed her expression completely. She suddenly looked disappointed.

"What's wrong, kiddo?" her father asked. She sighed.

"I think he's lying to me".

"Dan?"

"Yeah".

There was silence for a moment. Cal frowned.

"What happened?" Emily shifted in her seat, but answered without hesitation.

"Well, he came to the party all right, but after an hour or so he said he had to go home because he had to study".

"And that is not possible because…?" "Because the Science mid-term is not until next week, and he never studies. Plus, his face was just, I don't know, something was off".

"You're too perceptive" Cal bit his lip, deep in thought.

"Well, if he was lying to me, I would want to know" she replied.

He froze. "Are you sure?"

"Duh. Definitely".

Cal's insides churned. So many times he had wanted to shake Gillian from her bubble and tell her she shouldn't put up with her husband's lies, but she didn't want that. Or at least that was what she had said. And now Emily was telling him this, indirectly asking him to be honest if he happened to find out something. But, no matter how mature Em was for her age, he knew that if her boyfriend was indeed lying, she would be deeply hurt. And he didn't want to mess with their relationship, he was aware that he would get caught in the middle and the worst case scenario would be Emily hating him for years to come. It was only too easy to imagine himself inspecting the boy's facial expressions, and making him look ridiculous in front of his girlfriend, spotting all his lies and even the most remote little things that he surely kept hidden. Ok, he thought, he was over 50, but that didn't mean he didn't remember what it was like to be a teenager, and he could here disagree with Gillian about what she had said, that "we're not all hiding something". There was always something.

"Anyway… I'm trying not to think too much about it, I guess I will know soon enough. You know, lies don't really go too far in our household" she smiled knowingly. Cal returned a crooked smile, showing his teeth and letting out a soft chuckle. He ruffled the hair on the top of her head.

"I second that thought".

Emily turned on the stereo and took out an old CD from her purse. Her father glanced at it from the corner of his eye and was surprised to see it was one of his oldest Stevie Wonder records. "Where'd you get that?"

"I found it at Mom's a few days ago, while I was tidying the living room. I just fell in love with it". "Yeah, he's a genius" Cal nodded.

Emily turned the volume up a little bit and held the plastic box in her hands. "Is it yours?" "Not anymore" he breathed.

She scrunched up her nose. "Did Mom steal it from you?"

They both laughed, and Cal shook his head. "No. I gave it to her when we got married. It was her favourite CD from my collection". Emily smiled.

"That was nice of you".

"Well, I never really thought it would be hers alone someday, if you know what I mean" he told her sternly.

"Yeah, I know". Cal looked into her eyes while they waited for the traffic light to go green, just a block away from home.

"I'm sorry, luv". Emily's eyebrows went bleak.

"Dad…" she placed one hand on his forearm, "don't beat yourself up over it. I know you loved each other. Nobody gets married with hopes of divorcing afterwards". He was genuinely surprised at her closeness. She always spoke her mind, but physical contact was almost never part of the picture, at least not coming from her. "And if it makes you feel better, I must say you've never disappointed me, neither of you. So I guess we can say you've done a pretty damn good job".

By this time they were already in Cal's driveway, turning off the engine. Emily walked out of the car and up to the door, grabbing her keys and opening it. Her hand still on the doorknob, she turned to her father and said, "Oh and, Dan's coming over tomorrow night. For dinner. So please be civil to him, _if you know what I mean_". She stressed every word as if she were his mother, telling him how to behave. Cal laughed to himself while locking the car and then walked into the house.

"Em" he cried up the stairs.

"Yeah?" came her answer.

"Have you had dinner?"

"Yeah!!!" she yelled back at him.

He locked the door and went into the kitchen. There was nothing in the fridge other than a nearly empty carton of milk and a yogurt (why in the hell he had yogurt and not real food was beyond him). He settled with some noodles and a glass of wine, while he thought about everything that had happened in the last few hours. First, Gillian. Why they were still doing this dance was not a mystery to him, but he only wished they could cut to the chase once and for all. Of course, that was bordering on impossible, since day one and still now.

Then, the fact that Emily was being lied to by her boyfriend. Well, she wasn't sure, but she was good at reading faces, and if she had noticed something weird, it meant that there was definitely something that this guy was not telling her. For some reason he felt trapped, just like he did when he knew Alec was cheating on Gillian but couldn't do anything about it. It pissed the hell out of him, he wished he hadn't known, but he couldn't help it for obvious reasons.

And finally, Zoe. He was honest when he said that he never thought they'd split. He remembered the first time he saw her: walking down the street right outside his new apartment, when he had just moved to the US. She was so beautiful and spontaneous; he remembered running after her to give her a notepad she had accidentally dropped from her purse when she took out her wallet to get the paper at the corner of 39th. When he finally got to her, he was nearly speechless, not to mention absolutely breathless. She had found him quite charming, and he could see that by the way she used her hands and how she smiled. He had told her to be more careful the next time, she could lose something really important and he might not be around to pick it up. She had laughed, bemused, and told him she hoped there would be a next time. A month later, they met again and he asked her out. Little did he know that she had deliberately walked past his building four times in less than a month.

While he thought about all this, Emily was upstairs, silently looking at the cover of Stevie Wonder's "Songs in the Key of Life". Now knowing the true story behind that record, it held for her a new meaning, and it seemed so much more special. She tried to imagine how things were before she was born, when Cal and Zoe were just young and in love, and shared the little things that made them happy day by day, before Cal became obsessed with the idea of spotting lies everywhere and started studying his wife's eyebrows and muscles. She had to admit that she resented him a little bit because of that, but having inherited and learnt his skill almost perfectly, she could also relate to him and knew that he must've felt terrible most of the time. She herself had experienced it: wishing that she hadn't seen him do the "eye thing" or the "shoulder thing", trying hard not to pick up on the stressed words or the bulging eyes, but it was hard to turn the radar off once you got the hang of it.

There was a knock on the door and she turned around.

"Hey, luv. Can I come in?" She nodded and made a little space for him on the bed where she was outstretched.

He sat beside her and looked at her intently.

"You ok, Dad?"

"Yeah" he nodded. "Just came to say good night".

"Okay" she sat up and kissed his cheek. "Good night". Cal rubbed her arm.

"I love you kiddo".

"M'too, Dad" Emily smiled. He sighed and stood up, walking towards the door.

Before exiting, he turned back to Emily. "Under the plastic".

Emily remained with a confused look on her face while her father's footsteps became fainter.

She glanced down at the CD. The whole thing was plastic. What did he mean "under the plastic"? She contemplated it for a few seconds until she decided to take off the black plastic lid where the CD was supposed to be put. Under it was the paper that made the back cover.

There, hidden to everyone but them, was the proof. Written in black ink, perfect handwriting, it read:

"Love, you have made me the happiest man in the world".


	3. Author's Note

Hello everyone!!

Well, this is just a note to let you all know that I am unfortunately having back problems, and I went to the doctor today and he said absolutely no computer until Sunday at least... So yeah, it sucks, but I am really going to do as he says because I haven't been feeling very well, actually. Still, I didn't want to leave you all hanging without saying anything about it. Hopefully in these few days that I won't use the computer I'll be able to write down all my ideas and update not only chapter 3 but also 4 when I get back on track (lol).

Thanks everyone for your patience, and of course for your lovely reviews!!! 

Please, be nice to me, and give me a few more days. With some luck I'll be back soon.

Love,

Rose


	4. Chapter 3

**Note: Well, as my luck would have it, it was a bit worse that I thought. I suffer from vertigo (and it's pretty bad) if I spend more than one hour with the computer. I guess it's just gonna be this way until I'm done with the treatment and my back gets back to normal. So for now I'm probably going to write shorter chapters (as you will see, this one is shorter than the previous ones). I'm really sorry about that. But it's better than nothing, right?**

**On the bright side, I was really glad to get your comments hoping that I would get well soon. I hope so too. Thanks to everyone who commented and keep doing so, it keeps me motivated!!!**

**Disclaimers: See chapter 2 (:**

Chapter III

Cal sat on his chair with a thoughtful expression on his face.

He bit the tip of his pen, then leant forward to read something in the file, then laid back again.

He tapped the pen nervously against the table.

He swiveled in his chair to look out the window at the bright morning sky, still deeply troubled by his thoughts.

"Cal?" Gillian called from the door of his office. He turned abruptly to face her, concern written all over his features.

"You ok?" she asked suddenly, seeing his expression. He reflected on his thoughts for a minute, Gillian's body entering the room to approach a few steps.

"Yeah" he replied. "Just worried about the case. What do you need, luv?" She smiled, relieved.

"Just wanted you to know, Christina Souza is coming over in half an hour. Her boyfriend agreed to be interrogated". Cal stared at her.

"Okay. Thanks", he looked out the window and back again. "Anything else?"

Gillian frowned and walked up to his desk, leaning over it to look directly into Cal's eyes.

"Look, Cal, I know you're not exactly thrilled with this case, but, these kids need us. If the allegations are true, we need to find out so that they will not have to endure this torment anymore". He nodded, sighing and placing his hand over Gillian's.

"I know" he answered. "I know".

She smiled understandingly, letting him see that she knew what he was feeling.

"Okay, then. I'll catch up with you in a minute" Cal said. Gillian stood up, gave him a slight nod, and walked out. Just minutes later, Loker popped his head in.

"Hey boss".

Lightman checked his watch: 10:20. When he acknowledged the boy's presence, he walked in, just like Gillian had only moments before.

"I got a hold of the kids' psychologist" he stretched his arm and gave Cal a post-it. "Linda Ackerman, that's her number". Cal stood up.

"Good" he gave the paper back to Loker. "Call her in".

As he was walking away, leaving Loker behind him, pouting already because of his boss' indifference, his secretary walked in. She was fidgeting with her sleeves and her eyebrows were pulled together and up.

"Dr. Lightman" she said, trying to avert his searching eyes but in vain, "it's Miss Landau on line 2".

Cal heard the stress in her voice and picked up the phone without taking his eyes off her.

"Hello".

His face showed first surprise, then concern.

"What's wrong, luv?" He frowned and his jaw dropped slightly, astonishment washing over him. "Okay, calm down. No, calm down, yes, I'll meet you there. See you. Bye".

When he hung up, both Loker and his secretary's eyes were fixed on him. He stormed out of the office, followed by the two, and rushed to find Gillian. She was in the lab talking to Torres and planning the interrogation for Souza's boyfriend. Apparently, he was a pretty aggressive man, and had marked pathological problems which had ruined his previous marriage. Although they had enough experience, they still wanted to be as prepared as possible.

"Foster" Lightman called from the threshold. Gillian turned around and was taken aback by his expression.

"What happened?" she asked, not even attempting to hide the worried tone of her voice.

A deafening silence hung between them for a few seconds. He looked like he couldn't find the correct words to express all the things that were going on in his head.

"There's been a shooting at Emily's school".

Nobody spoke, but the emotion that crossed all their faces was exactly the same.

"I have to go, Zoe's waiting for me, you take the case" he answered hurriedly, swallowing hard.

"No way, Cal, I'm coming with you" Gillian answered him.

"No, seriously, Foster. You don't have to do that".

"I want to".

She turned to the secretary and ordered her to escort Miss Souza and her boyfriend in as soon as they got there, and then shot a determined look at Torres.

"You two will take this interview", Torres nodded and Gillian glanced at Loker, still showing surprise on his face. "If you can handle it without calling us until we choose to communicate, you might start getting paid again".

If Eli's emotions could've been classified as any, his face would've read Surprise x10.

"You got that?" both of them nodded and Gillian walked out, dragging Cal by his arm.

"That really wasn't necessary" he said in a low voice.

"Cal, I wasn't gonna let you go on your own. It's Emily we're talking about".

Cal shook his head.

"I meant the lie you just told Loker".

Gillian paused and looked at him sternly.

"Oh. I wasn't lying".

-

Fifteen minutes later they arrived at Emily's school. Gillian had driven since she considered Cal was not up to it, and she was right.

There were firefighters and policemen; thousands of kids huddled up outside the building, as far as possible from the place where it had happened. Many were crying, others were terribly scared, others, confused.

As soon as he saw the chaos that had taken over the block, he started shaking his head and mumbling, "Oh God, Emily, Emily..."

She looked at Cal with caring eyes.

"Cal, look at me". But he was already climbing out of the car. "Cal! Cal, wait" Gillian shouted at him and grabbed his arm.

He turned to her, his eyes unfocused.

"Cal, you're not making it any easier. Let's-"

Then she saw Zoe, standing only a few feet away from them, and Emily curled up against her, looking at the disturbing scene.

"She's okay" she told Cal, smiling and pointing at the place where his ex-wife and daughter stood.

Cal followed her gaze and ran towards them. Gillian watched as he yelled: "Em!". The girl recognized the voice at once and jumped up into her father's embrace, her eyes tearful and afraid. Gillian approached slowly, while Cal held onto Emily and kissed her forehead, caressing the top of her head, relieved that she was unharmed. Zoe stood beside them with her arms folded across her chest, and bit her lip as she nodded at Cal with a strained expression.

"Hey" he said, looking up at her.

"Hi" she replied. Cal looked back at Emily, just as Gillian appeared.

"Hi, Emily" she greeted her with a warm smile, also showing how much better she felt now that she knew the girl was okay.

Zoe, however, was not as welcoming towards Gillian and did nothing to hide the disgust that crossed her features as their eyes met. Cal knelt down in front of Emily and took her hands in his.

"What happened, hun?" his voice was soft and soothing, although Foster knew that he was still a bit shaken up.

"I don't know, I... I-" Emily sighed in frustration. "I was in the classroom next to his. It was scary. I... It was a senior, I didn't know him but, he shot Miss Sullivan, and... And..."

Emily broke into uncontrollable sobs and Zoe knelt down to cradle her in her arms. Cal rubbed the older woman's arm and they shared an understanding look as they both consoled their only daughter, who looked so small and vulnerable all of a sudden.

Gillian felt awkward and out of place, and started hating herself for having gone there. She decided she would make herself useful and give the three of them a chance to be alone and breathe.

"I'll be right back" she told Cal softly, putting a hand on his shoulder. He looked up at her gratefully and nodded.

Gillian walked away and up to the entrance of the school, where the police officers were gathered.

"Excuse me" she called to one of them. "Excuse me. I'm-"

"I'm sorry Miss, I'm afraid you have to stay outside the marked area" a broad-shouldered man told her, lifting his hand in front of her.

"I work for the police" Foster partly lied, "I just want to know what's going on right now" she informed.

The man eyed her suspiciously.

"Who are you?"

"Dr. Gillian Foster, from the Lightman Group" she stretched her hand out and shook his, "we're deception experts".

The man still looked like he didn't trust her. She sighed.

"Dr. Lightman's daughter attends this school. He's here right now and we just want to know whether there's anything we can do for you-"

"There's nothing you can do" the policeman interrupted her, "the boy has been arrested and the wounded are being taken to the hospital".

Gillian stayed still, staring at him.

She breathed deeply.

"How many?"

"Really, Dr...."

"Foster".

"Dr. Foster, I don't think you should-"

"How many? Are they okay?" Gillian's motherly instincts started kicking in.

"A teacher, three students. Thankfully we got here on time. I understand the teacher and one of the girls are in delicate condition".

The man didn't move as Foster took it all in and read his face, looking for any signs that he was concealing any information.

"Will you let us do our job properly now?" he asked her, exasperated.

"Yes, sorry. And thank you" Gillian responded. "And, if you need anything..."

The man nodded and looked over his shoulder towards his mates.

"Yeah, sure. Bye".

Gillian was left looking after him, now feeling even more useless than before. Now again, what was she thinking, going over there and playing cop? Did she actually expect them to take her up on her offer to help? Of course not. Everyone had seen the boy shooting the teacher. No deception expert whatsoever was needed. At all.

"Foster" a familiar voice made her react. She looked over her shoulder at Cal, walking up to her.

"Hey. Um, the police said they don't need our help and as far as they know, two out of the four victims are in delicate condition."

Cal stared at the building, his eyes half closed and his hands on his hips.

"You know, we never really think about these things until they happen to someone we care about" he said glumly, even apologetically, as if it had been his fault.

"Cal, there's nothing you could've done about it" Gillian offered. "These kids do not know how to read someone who's about to shoot his classmates".

He nodded, obviously still disturbed by the situation.

"How's Emily?" she asked almost automatically.

"Bit anxious" came his reply. Gillian nodded. "But she's okay. She's worried about her friends. Scared... Overwhelmed. It could've been any of them hadn't the police arrived on time".

It all sounded so surreal, like Cal said. Not something one would think about until it suddenly hits terribly close to home.

"And you? Are you okay?"

He sighed.

"Just happy that nothing happened to her. Other than that, you know me. We've still got the Hayman-Souza case to get into".

"Torres and Loker are on it, stop worrying. For now, at least".

They started walking back to where Emily and Zoe were.

"There's something weird about the father. Seriously" Cal continued.

"Cal" Gillian said in a warning tone, "we'll talk about it when we get back to-"

"Is that Dan?" Cal asked disbelievingly, more to himself than to Gillian.

She followed his gaze and saw a tall, dark-haired boy with his arms around a slightly shorter, brunette girl.

"You mean Emily's Dan?"

"Yeah" Cal replied.

They both looked at them. They were hugging.

And they were awfully close.

"That's not Emily there" Cal continued.

"What's he doing with that girl?" he asked, his fists clenching angrily.

"Stop it, Cal, maybe they're just friends. He's just comforting her" Gillian told him, trying to ease his rising temperature.

"Oh, yes, I'm sure that's what he's doing".

"Oh come on! Look at what just happened! I would need a hug too!" she raised her voice as she realized Cal was not listening to her.

"Cal, come on. What's crept up your ass?"

That did it.

He turned to look at Gillian, eyes wide open with surprise.

"What?"

"You've never been so protective of her. I know you're a little shaky now, but you really should let it go".

Cal felt himself growing angry with Gillian, as impossible as that sounded.

"You don't know what you're talking about".

"What do you mean I don't know what I'm talking about?"

Cal gritted his teeth.

"He's lying to her!" he yelled.

"How do you know that?"

"Because she told me!" he spat at her. "She can read him like a book and she saw that he was hiding something".

She was flustered, to say the least, by his sudden uproar.

"And how do you know _that_ something is this?"

"Isn't it pretty obvious?" Cal inquired, eyebrows up.

Gillian steadied herself before answering.

"No, Cal, it is not obvious. For all we know, it could be his sister".

And then, something she wasn't expecting just happened.

A thought in his eyes.

Recognition.

Contempt.

"His sister" Cal slurred.

She nodded, still confused by the sudden transparency of his features.

"His sister, sure" he chuckled and shook his head almost mockingly. "Yeah, keep telling yourself that".

With that, he walked away.

And it was only then that Gillian realised what he had said.

And it hurt.

And he had definitely, _definitely_ crossed the line.


	5. Chapter 4

**Note: Sorry for the wait!! I just got back to my normal life today, holidays are over and I'm back at university. Since I had my first Linguistic Structures and Writing Workshop classes today, I got really inspired and couldn't wait to get home to revise this chapter and publish it. So here it is!!! It's a little intense, ok? Remember it's M rated, and that's got a reason. Lol. And, it's based on a real case involving someone I know, so please, try to be respectful and careful when you review. (Which you MUST do, please! It makes me happy and it helps me grow as a writer. So thanks many to everyone who drops a line!!)**

**Disclaimers: See chapter 2!!!**

**Hope you enjoy it!!!**

Chapter IV

"Is your name Linda Ackerman? "

"Yes".

"Are you a child psychologist?"

"Yes".

"How long have you been in the business?"

"Twelve years".

Cal Lightman was questioning the woman.

She seemed a little tense, her hands clasped together on the table and shifting from one position to another on her chair. Her face, however, kept calm. Cal thought it quite impressive that she could actually refrain from showing anxiety on her face while her whole body was screaming out the contrary.

He hoped that this wouldn't last long: Miss Ackerman was the missing piece of the puzzle. They had not been able to interrogate Mr. Hayman, since he was a very important man and he was swamped with meetings all day long, all throughout the week. Of course, the fact that he would refuse to make time for a simple, five minute interrogation made Cal believe he was guilty even more than he did at first. But, since children are not usually very good liars, the Lightman Group thought it would be enough to talk to the mother, her boyfriend, and the psychologist, while Gillian tested the children with some easy tasks involving drawing or telling a story.

Gillian and Cal were not talking to each other. At least not about anything not related to business.

He had left her alone the previous day in his daughter's school, and gone home with Emily and his ex-wife to take care of the girl. Gillian, on the other hand, had left on her own and on the verge of tears. The only thing she'd said to him when she walked into his office on the present day, was "Here's your stuff", and then threw Loker's report of the boyfriend's interrogation onto his desk, before she stormed into her own office with raging determination.

Cal had read the report intently. There was nothing very interesting about it, other than the fact that Mr. Starks hated Hayman, and he had threatened to kill him if he didn't leave the kids alone. The father had been accused of abusing his three children sexually, after investigating one of the girls' situation since she was falling asleep during class a lot. She had said she was not sleeping at home because she was afraid of closing her eyes, especially in the dark.

Most people said that it was impossible that Hayman would do something like that, but nonetheless his ex-wife pressed charges, and that was when Linda Ackerman came into the picture. She was called into the case by the judge, to go deeper into the children's memories and fears and try to get as much information as she could. At first, she said they showed signs of abuse, but then all of a sudden decided that the previous facts were not right and, after testing them again, said that no such thing had happened. Miss Souza was, of course, deeply angered, and suspected that her ex-husband was blackmailing the woman.

"Why are you here today?"

"To talk about the Hayman children".

"Good. What can you tell us about them?"

Anxiety. She was caressing her right hand with her left thumb.

"They are… Nice, _healthy_ kids".

She stressed the word healthy, as if there were something important behind it.

"Just nice, and healthy?" Lightman pressed, leaning back in his chair, his arm hanging behind it.

"Exactly" Linda said with a slight smile. But her head was shaking no.

Lightman grinned at her, then pointed at her with his pen.

"_Exactly_. You're saying no with your head. You're so busy trying to keep composure as you make up your answers, that you don't control your other expressions that might give you away".

He was now leaning into her.

"Tell me, Linda, what is it about these children that is not so healthy?"

The woman was visibly upset now, and Loker, who was outside in the lab, got a kick out of seeing Lightman in action, Ackerman's pulse creating high spikes on the screen.

"Nothing, I told you!"

"No, you told me there was something wrong, love" he responded smugly.

"There's nothing wrong with them" she said, her eyebrows showing fear for less than a millionth of a second.

But Lightman was an expert.

"Oh, I don't think that's the case", he leant in even more and looked her square in the eye. "I'm telling you, you're good. Until now, your face hadn't shown any emotion. Almost had me fooled" he lied, "But, a second ago, your eyebrows showed fear".

The psychologist looked away from his piercing stare.

"What is it?" he asked.

There was no answer.

And right then, without further ado, he spat out:

"Is he blackmailing you?"

* * *

Meanwhile, Foster was in a room with the three children. Tate was 10, Grace was 8, and Holly, 5. The three of them had beautiful skin colour, given to them by their Caucasian father and Afroamerican mother (her parents were African and Brazilian). So far, she had only been talking to them, asking about their likes and dislikes, trying to make them feel comfortable. Then she decided to go on to another exercise.

"Holly, do you know how to read?" she asked sweetly.

"Only my name" the little girl replied.

"Tate is a good reader" Grace interrupted, "I really like listening to him".

She smiled a big, pearl white grin, and Gillian instantly knew she meant it.

The boy frowned.

"I don't want to read".

"Oh, come on" Gillian insisted. "Just a short story, for your sisters".

He looked at the two younger girls and sighed. Then he turned to Gillian with a pout.

"Which one?"

She handed him a copy of "The Three Little Pigs" and he started reading. At first, everything was fine. But then, when he started reading about the wolf, there was so much anger in his voice that for a moment, Gillian was genuinely scared. She looked for any reactions from the little girls, but their faces were expressionless. No reflectors, no feelings, nothing.

It was only at the end, when the wolf died, that Holly gave a sigh of relief and looked down. Then she looked up at Gillian and said: "Can we draw?"

She gave them a few sheets of paper and crayons, and sat down in the other corner of the room.

There was something strange there. Why weren't the girls reacting to _anything_ in the story? Why weren't they surprised by the anger in their brother's voice?

Honestly, she was quite scared to find out.

* * *

Gillian walked into the lab with great haste, and a troubled look on her face. She had a few papers in her hands and appeared to be uneasy.

"Hey doc" Loker greeted her. He turned to look at her. "Wow, you're looking good!" he said, appreciative of her tight-fitted red dress and blue stilettos. Then his gaze wandered up to her face.

"Okay, from the neck down, at least" he frowned. "What's going on?"

"I need to show this to Lightman".

"What is it?"

Just then Ria walked in.

"That Hayman is an idiot" she growled. "He won't even pick up the phone. That pompous, stuck up, damn idiot".

"And a sick one, for that" Gillian said as she handed them the papers. Loker's jaw dropped, and Ria gritted her teeth in repulsion. They looked at the scene inside the cube.

"I asked, is he blackmailing you?" Lightman groaned.

"No" Linda moaned in response, taking a hand up to her forehead, showing shame and guilt.

Lightman stared at her for a few seconds.

"Is he paying you to hide the truth?"

Her silence was enough for him to assume the answer was yes.

"Did you find signs of abuse?"

Again, silence.

Outside, Gillian was getting desperate, her eyes disorbited.

"_Did_ you, or did you _not _find signs of abuse?" Lightman started again.

"Listen, I know you must think you're going to lose your job because of this, but truth is, it will only get worse if you don't cooperate and we then find out the allegations were true. Believe me, you are not essential to this investigation" he waved his hand around and shrugged his mouth, "we have other ways to find out the truth. But if you help us, we might be able to help you too".

She held his gaze for a while, then looked down and away.

"He paid me when he found out I was actually getting somewhere with the kids. I mean, I didn't have solid evidence, but-"

At that moment, Gillian stepped into the cube and stood beside her.

"But I do" she snapped, tossing the disturbing drawings onto the table right in front of the woman. "When asked to represent her family, this is what Holly did".

The young girl's coloured drawing showed her mother and siblings as normal people. Her father, however, had big, dark eyes, sharp fangs, and giant claws painted black. Typical of abused children.

"Oh, by the way, I let Tate draw whatever he wanted" she said with a hint of rage. "And_ this_, is what he gave me".

Gillian's slender fingers pushed Holly's drawing aside, revealing her brother's underneath. It was sexually explicit, and left no doubt in their minds that this case was closed.

* * *

"What do you think you're doing?" Gillian told Lightman when she heard him hang up the phone with the detective leading the investigation.

He stared at her for what seemed like forever, and tilted his head.

"I'm telling the investigators what we've found out" he replied matter-of-factly.

"Aren't you going to tell the people at court?"

Gillian smiled in disbelief.

"It's not our job" Lightman answered. He shrugged. "I told the people who hired us. They asked us to treat this case carefully, and that's what I'm doing".

Foster was now fuming.

"Please tell me you're kidding me".

"I'm not" he responded, getting a little impatient. "We've done our part, now let them handle it whatever way they want".

"What? Don't you see, Cal, that this man is more powerful than most of the people in DC? He can easily pay the jury off so that they won't do anything about it!"

"That's not our place, Foster".

"Listen to me! We have to do something about it! This man is a sick, twisted person! These kids are suffering, Cal, think about Emily. What if it was her getting abused? It is not fair! This man doesn't even deserve to be considered as such! He doesn't deserve to be a father!"

There was silence for slightly less than a full minute, and Cal finally spoke.

"Don't. Make. This. Personal. Foster".

"_Excuse_ me?"

"You heard me".

"You are the one making it personal, Cal!!!" Gillian yelled at him.

"How so?" he raised his voice also.

"Yesterday, at Emily's high school, implying that I was a fool to believe that Christine was just Alec's sponsor and nothing more!"

Cal remained speechless.

"How dare you compare my relationship to a teenager's" she choked out in between tears. "I thought you knew better than that, Cal. I thought you knew _me_ better".

She wiped a tear with the back of her hand.

"How _dare_ you" she repeated, her stomach revolting as she remembered his hurtful words the previous evening. "You think I didn't see that? You think I didn't know? _I_ chose to give it another shot. I chose to _trust_ him, and I. Got. Hurt".

She was spitting every word out as if they were venom, yet her eyes showed that they were as true as they could get.

"And since you stepped way out of line" she paused, looking at him with so much pain that for a moment he actually ached physically.

"… I'm going to do the same, and say that I chose to trust him, because I _loved_ him".

Gillian locked her eyes with his.

"Which is more than you can say for yourself, right?"

Her eyebrows went up as she asked him this, and Cal understood that she didn't need him to reply. She already knew the answer to this question.

He knew it too.

Gillian walked out of the office before he could collect himself.

He blinked back tears for the first time in a very long time, and watched her go, feeling miserable and guilty and ashamed.

He swallowed, but felt as though nothing could get through his throat.

He was not going to have dinner tonight. Absolutely not.


	6. Chapter 5

**Note: Hello everyone!! I'm glad to be back after a week of non-stop homework from my lovely teachers at university :P I was hoping to get some more reviews before posting this chapter, but I guess I've waited enough. Thanks to all the people who have reviewed and added this story to their lists, it makes me very happy!! **

**Now, this is shorter than the rest of the chapters but I needed to get this Cal/Emily thing in before I continued. And if this chapter just went from Cal/Emily to Cal/Gillian and then back to Emily, it was just going to get confusing, boring, and forgettable. Lol. So here you go!!! READ AND REVIEW please!!**

**Disclaimers: I do NOT own LTM or any of its characters, I only do this for fun, not for profit whatsoever and no copyright infringement is intended :D**

Chapter V

"Dad?"

No response.

"Dad, what happened to Gillian? She was crying when-"

Then she stopped speaking as Cal turned to her, looking anything but healthy, yet expressionless. Emily's eyebrows gave away her surprise, but she didn't move.

"Don't worry, love" he said. "It's nothing".

He stood up from his slouching position on the couch and walked to the door of the office, Emily following close behind.

"You know, I can stay over at Mom's tonight if you want, it's fine by me".

Cal shook his head no.

"Okay, what's going on?"

Lightman faced his daughter's questioning look and cursed himself for being so weak at the moment. He tilted his head to the side.

"Nothing".

"It's not nothing, look at you" she insisted. He glanced at his own body, then looked back at her.

"I mean your face. You look like crap" Emily's eyes widened as she nodded.

"Okay, young lady, that's it. We're leaving".

* * *

Cal lay on his bed, staring at the ceiling, reflecting upon his own thoughts. Emily was downstairs, watching a movie. School had been suspended for a week: one of the victims of the shooting had died at the hospital early in the morning. He had checked up on her not so long ago, and though she seemed weary, she said she was okay.

Due to the way events had unfolded, Dan had not come over for dinner the previous day, and Cal didn't dare ask Emily whether she had talked to him or not.

There was a knock on the door and Emily's head popped in.

"May I?" she asked shyly.

"Sure" Cal answered. She lay down beside him.

"Can I tell you something?"

She started fidgeting with her sleeves and her eyes were fixed on her hands. Cal put his arm around her shoulder.

"Yup".

"Just promise you won't tell anyone".

"I promise" Cal said, hoping it was not what he was imagining.

"I talked to Dan".

His stomach flipped.

"Remember how I told you I thought he was lying?"

He nodded.

"Well… Turns out, he was" Emily sighed.

Her father stayed silent, trying not to let his feelings control him.

Slowly, she pronounced the following words.

"His dad's got lung cancer", she glanced at him for a second and then continued. "They say it's pretty advanced already, and his mom is really depressed… They're quite scared right now, you know?"

"I- I can imagine" Cal managed to get out, short of breath.

On one hand, he was relieved that it had nothing to do with Emily. But on the other, he was suddenly sad, and felt bad for having distrusted Dan when the reason for his lying was something so serious.

"I just wish there was something I could do for him" Emily shook her head, frowning.

Cal took a deep breath and squeezed Emily's shoulder.

"Well, the best thing you can do is support him. If you care for him, I mean. Just-" he paused, "let him know that you'll be there for him".

Emily smiled a little.

"Dad…"

"Yes?"

"You should do the same".

"Dan's not my boyfriend", Cal smiled, showing his teeth slightly. "But as for you, I'll always be here. You know that, kiddo, right?"

"I didn't mean me, or Dan".

She stared at him, and he stared back quizzically.

"You lost me".

She grinned disbelievingly.

"You're not gonna make me say it, are you?"

"Say what?" Cal inquired with a certain exasperation that showed he really didn't know what she meant.

"Gillian, Dad" Emily concluded, eyes searching.

Cal frowned, but said nothing.

"I've noticed, you know? You're not talking to each other", she started with a sigh. "And you don't look comfortable around her anymore. And now, that's a first".

"Em, I appreciate you trying to back me up, but it's just complicated right now".

The girl stared at her father, processing his words, before continuing.

"I'm not backing _you_ up, Dad. Gillian's the one who's recently divorced. And I don't know what happened between you but I know she probably hates what's going on".

Cal was not in the least surprised by Emily's maturity and empathy. He opened his mouth but Emily interrupted him.

"I mean, come on, it's Gillian. Happy, funny Gillian. I don't think she just happened to decide she wasn't gonna be funny anymore from one day to another".

For a few seconds, there was silence, and Cal tried to let his daughter's words sink in, still a bit overwhelmed because of the fact that his own sixteen year-old kid was lecturing him about how to treat a woman.

"What made you so angry, Dad?"

"Em…" he gasped, taken aback.

"Was it Alec? 'Cause I would totally understand. I mean, guys only get really angry when it's about a woman they care for. If they don't care about her, they don't make such a fuss".

Okay, he thought, could this get any weirder?

Cal considered his options. But there was no way he was going to get out of this one without giving himself away.

"I guess it was Alec" he responded in defeat.

"O-kay" Emily smiled half-heartedly. "Getting somewhere now".

Cal chuckled, staring at the ceiling again.

She let her head rest on his shoulder.

"You're not going to tell me what happened with Gillian, right?" she asked boldly.

"No" he laughed.

"I didn't think so".

Emily sat up and placed a hand on her father's chest.

"I still think you should call her" she said, and leaned down to kiss his cheek. "'Night, Dad".

"G'night, kiddo".

As soon as the door closed, Cal's hand was on the phone.

He dialed.

One ring.

His breathing was becoming labored.

Two rings.

Just pick up already!

Three rings.

Four rin-

"Hello?" came the soft voice on the other side.

"Hi".

* * *

Review please!

* * *


	7. Chapter 6

**Disclaimers: I do not own LTM or any of its characters. The fragment at the beginning is from the song "20 Good Reasons" by Thirsty Merc and I do not own that either. I'm keeping it short and simple cause you'll surely want to read this loooong overdue chapter.**

**Note: As I said, long overdue. I'm sorry about that, but I went on a mission to a very small town with no internet connection whatsoever. Amazing experience, I am absolutely blissful right now. I love God. Lol. I hope no-one is bothered by my sudden outburst of religious babble. THANKS for all your reviews, you know they feed my imagination and motivation... It still wouldn't hurt me to get some more, so if you wanna tell your friends about it I'll be glad. Now... ENJOY!!!!**

_But life is life  
And things will change  
Like scenes upon an actor's stage  
Tomorrow comes today  
For all we know - 20 Good Reasons, Thirsty Merc  
_

Chapter VI

His voice caught in his throat, and he waited, silently, as she breathed deeply.

"Cal?" she asked, not because she had any doubt that it was him, but more as a warning.

"I'm… very sorry" he said bleakly, swallowing hard.

She heard it.

She could almost see the furrowing of his brows as silence washed over them, her being completely unresponsive. She pursed her lips in quiet apprehension, her free hand resting on the curve of her hip.

On the other side of the line stood Cal, fidgeting with the curtains of his room, licking his lips in anxiety.

He looked out at the lit street; everything was calm.

Gillian was calm, too.

"You there, lo-" he stopped cold.

Inappropriate.

She replied almost instantly.

"I'm here".

He heard the hurt in her stern voice and mentally cursed himself. He looked out the window again and over the city. Then he turned around and took a long look at his bedroom door. He thought about Emily.

Hell, Emily could manage.

"I can't do this" he breathed out raggedly. "Not on the phone. I'm coming over".

Gillian nodded and bit her lip.

"Okay".

Cal stayed on his spot for a second, immobile, then nodded too.

"Okay".

As he hung up and walked out of the room, he prayed that Gillian had accepted his coming over as a sign that she really wanted to forgive him. He walked up to Emily's door and knocked.

"Em?"

"Yes, Dad?"

"I'm going over to Gillian's", he said quietly.

In no time, Emily's head popped out the door to eye him inquisitively.

"Did you talk to her?"

Cal's hands went into his pockets and he shrugged.

"I can't do it over the phone".

His daughter nodded understandingly.

"I'll be ok. Go".

Cal started to move, but then looked at her over his shoulder for reassurance.

"Will you?"

"Yes, Dad, really" she smiled. "Go. Before she changes her mind".

"Thank you" he said in a low whisper before jogging out and into his car.

As he drove, he thought of all the things he wanted to tell her. He wanted her to know how sorry he really was.

He _needed_ her to know.

He felt ashamed of himself, unable to recognize this part of him that had hurt her so badly, when that was the last thing he wanted. He climbed out of his car and looked up at the building, breathing heavily, suddenly feeling nauseous.

Each step forward was one step closer to telling her everything.

* * *

The bell rang in Gillian's apartment.

She picked up at once and pressed a button. A faint buzz was heard on the other side, and then the sound of the heavy glass doors being pushed open. Soon after, the soft click of them closing.

She waited next to the door, heaving.

A strange, uneasy feeling settled at the pit of her stomach and she fought back the tears for the fifth time that day.

"Come on, Gillian. Toughen up", she told herself, right before there was a quiet knock on the door.

She opened it.

There he was, though she could not bring herself to look him in the eye.

That was a first.

Their eyes searched for one another's, dancing around, wanting to drown into each other, yet shy and unsure.

She was the first one to look up, but Cal was now staring at his feet, his hands on his hips.

He licked his lower lip slightly, then bit it, and with his head still hung low, he traveled up to her face with guilty eyes.

"I've been an ass".

"Tell me something I don't already know".

_First punch._

"I am really sorry, I would never hurt you, you know that-" he babbled.

"But you did, Cal" she cut him off. "There was no need to say the things you said".

"I-" he started, but she held her hand up to him.

"You've been through this situation yourself. You know it's not easy. I nearly had to take care of you like a baby the first few months after she left you".

He was tempted to smile, reminded of how sweet and loving Gillian had been when Zoe had dumped him.

But it only made him feel worse.

"I know, I know" he sighed. "I was worried about Emily, I'm sorry I was so insensitive" he blurted out.

"Cal, you don't understand. That's absolutely not the point. I'm not saying you should baby-sit me", Gillian replied, still leaning against the doorframe.

"Then what is it?"

She stared at him, arms crossed over her chest. She shook her head.

"The point, Cal, is that you compared _my_ relationship to_ your daughter's_" she smiled bitterly. "I'm not a teenager in the first place. And secondly-" she laughed sadly, "you used the most _horrible_ thing that happened to me, against me. That was a low blow, implying that I was an idiot for not "knowing" Alex was cheating".

She paused, looking resigned.

"Is that what you think of me?" she asked.

A tear glimmered in the corner of her eye as she studied the look on Cal's face. His mouth was slightly open, eyebrows bleak but pulled together.

After a moment's silence, he spoke.

"No, love. Not at all".

Gillian swallowed.

"You know- I could've expected such a thing from anyone…_Anyone-_ but you".

Something -big- squirmed inside of him.

She tilted her head to the side.

"What is it?"

"What's what?"

"You're scared".

Cal looked deep into her eyes for a long time.

Slowly, very slowly, he began to let his guard down.

Gillian watched, enthralled, as every mask on his face fell off.

The weight on his shoulders, his guilt, his sorrow, made him look older.

And then, with every fiber of his being, he told her what he was really afraid of.

Losing her.

Recognition swept over her features, and then sadness fell into place.

"No, Cal" she whined, tears beginning to fall.

But he nodded, pursing his lips. He motioned with his hand.

"What can I do?" he shook his head. "I can't help it, love".

Gillian gave one step backwards, her breath hitched in her throat. She felt like she could get no air into her system.

She opened her mouth, and, with great effort, said:

"Don't say it".

"What difference does it make?" he stepped forward.

She closed her eyes and covered her face with her trembling hands.

"Please".

"Why shouldn't I say it? You know now. You can see it".

"We shouldn't… You know what it's like, you- you…"

The words did not come out, no matter how hard she tried.

"It's all over my face" he raised his voice. "Words aren't any different for us, love. Why should I keep it to myself?"

"Cause if I see it, I can ignore it, just like everything beyond the line!" she nearly shouted. "You know how it works, Cal, and if you say it out loud, I can not pretend it's not there anymore!"

Her whole body shook with the force of her words.

His body was stone-cold, stock-still.

"You can't ignore it, Gillian".

The sound of her name on his lips for the first time tugged at her heart, and made her look up in between tears.

"Would you, really? Pretend like nothing happened?" he softened his voice.

"I'm telling you, the line is far behind us already. We're on the same side now, so I might just tell you the bloody truth".

Gillian locked her gaze with his.

It was too much to take in.

Should she speak? Should she shut him out?

If she told him to leave, could she ever act like nothing had been said?

He was right. Neither of them could pretend anymore. The fact that they wouldn't act on it did not make everything else disappear…

On the other hand, this was what she'd been waiting for for a long time now, so why was she hesitating?

He approached, lightly rubbing her shoulder. It was the first time they'd made physical contact in more days than they could remember.

"Why are you silent, love?"

"I can't. We. _We_ can't".

She looked tired and defeated.

"You do realize", she sighed profoundly, "that this would change _everything_?"

Cal smiled half-heartedly.

"Isn't that what happened just now?"

Gillian stared at the ceiling, wiping her eyes with the back of her porcelain hands.

"Give me one good reason, and I'll go".

She thought about it.

"I promise. I swear to God. One bloody good reason, and I'm out the door, and will never ever bring it up again".

He was letting her decide.

Her whole life went before her eyes.

Every relationship, every heartbreak.

Every moment with Alex, and every moment with Cal.

Every look, every smile, every tear.

Each kiss.

Each silence.

Like this one.

And she had to make something up, just for her own safety, for her sake. She couldn't just throw everything out the window, just-

"Because… Because it would never work between us, Cal".

"And why is that?"

No response.

"You know… Really…" he started.

She stared at him.

"That's not reason enough for me".

And, with unimaginable might, he closed the distance between them, his lips crushing her own for the very first time.

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	8. Chapter 7

**Disclaimers: I do not own LTM or any of its characters. No copyright infringement intended.**

**Note: Thanks to all of you who reviewed my story and were kind enough to bare with me while I caught up with my unattended subjects at university. It's been a hell of a month, and I am sorry that I can not keep this story updated as often as I would like to, cause I am really enjoying writing it, and your reviews are always a source of motivation, and why not, inspiration too. jjbird, ChocoLover1331, Amanda N. Lupin, JessSnapeRickman, toomuchsprite, Syldefish, LittleMsGiggles, csiAngel, RomanceNovels, AurumWolf21 and friscolover, my most sincere thanks to you all for the great replies for last chapter. Keep the reviews coming!!! Hope you enjoy this installment!!!**

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Chapter VII

Gillian's senses became alert as Cal's lips touched hers for the first time. She reveled in the warmth of his body, his hands posed softly on her neck, holding her close to him. His right thumb played with her earlobe, sending tingling sensations up and down her body as she found her own arms wrapping around his back and pressing herself to him. He moaned and his lips parted ever so slightly. She let him in just a little bit, not so much for it to become a full-on, open-mouthed kiss, but enough to feel his taste on her tongue.

That alone could've made her faint right on the spot. It was so different from everything she had imagined. And yes, she had tried to picture it in her mind more than once; she pleaded guilty for that. She had thought of almost any taste in her catalogue, even those which she could remember but not name nor associate with anything, yet it was none of those. Mostly, it was bitter… But it was not until she caught his unique scent that she could make out a flavor. Kissing Cal was like wine-tasting, and about that she was not surprised. He himself had all the mysterious characteristics of it –not to mention that Gillian was one of the many people who thought each birthday made him even better.

Cal could not help but shiver when Gillian opened her lips to give him entrance: this had been almost unthinkable a week ago. He brushed his thumb across her jaw line, her hands pressing against his back, radiating heat pulsating from her fingers. She tasted sweet and smelled even better –just what he was expecting. He wondered how such a graceful creature could not have found someone better than him. At least he was better than Alec, he thought, but still didn't think himself good enough for her.

Way too soon, he pulled back, sighing heavily.

"Gillian…"

He laid a soft kiss on the corner of her mouth, lingering there for a few seconds, until he felt her lip curve into a small smile. He pressed his forehead against hers and cupped her face in his hands once again. Her grip on his back loosened, not because she wanted to let go, but as a sign that the frantic need to cling to his shirt while kissing him had subsided.

She looked up shyly and rubbed his shoulder with a sigh.

"What am I going to do with you…" she laughed slightly.

Cal jokingly gave her a smug smile, which made her blush and giggle even more.

"I meant, _about_ you".

His face fell in a very exaggerated fashion and she slapped his arm playfully.

"I'm just kidding, love".

They stared into each other's eyes for a long moment. The word seemed to have changed meaning in a matter of minutes, and Gillian could not help but look at him in a whole new light now. There was something within her, something different-

Hope. That's what Cal found in her loving gaze right after he spoke to her. He was not surprised, but thankful for her reaction to his own decision to come clean. He knew she was still hurt by his previous doings, but he was also aware that, if there was one person who could wholly forgive him for being a prick, it was Gillian. And it was not that she was too good, or too flexible… She understood him. There was an undeniable connection between them and, without each other, something seemed missing in their lives. She could swear a thousand times that Cal was genuinely sorry, and be right, because she could see it all over his face, in every movement and every action –regardless of his words, and even if he said the contrary. But the fact that he admitted to having made a mistake made her _want_ to forgive him.

Gillian was pulled out of her trance by the awfully near sound of a door opening and closing, and she realized that her own door was still opened. She looked over Cal's shoulder and he followed her eyes in a quick glance.

"I think I should go" he said suddenly, taking her hand bashfully and caressing her palm slowly. "I left Emily home alone".

She grinned a little at this, but then regained seriousness and nodded.

"You should".

They walked the few feet up to the entrance together, and Cal stopped in the threshold.

"I am still very sorry for what I did", he turned to face her and bit his tongue. "And I promise I'll never do something like that again".

At the sight of his face contorting with sadness, she was truly moved, and placed a hand on his cheek.

"It's okay. Forgive and forget, right?"

He closed his eyes and nodded.

"Besides, I've had my fair share of unholy attitudes too".

At this, Cal's eyelids shot open and he stared at her questioningly while she removed her hand from his face.

"I… What?"

"Well… I have to admit I always kind of… God, this is so embarrassing- I sort of enjoyed watching you get jealous every time a guy even looked at me. It was especially fun with Jenkins, until, well-" she stopped, tilting her head to the side.

Cal was flabbergasted, to which she continued, seizing her opportunity.

"It's fine, though… You know they say you only save that kind of anger for a woman that you –really care about, right?" she probed.

He grinned, shaking his head in defeat, his hands on his hips. Then he looked back at her.

"Right".

She smiled.

"Okay. See you tomorrow, then".

"Yes", Cal answered in a low voice. "See you tomorrow".

He leaned in and kissed her cheek quickly, but she grabbed him by the wrist and pulled him in for a short kiss on the lips.

She searched his eyes and he laughed in amusement before speaking.

"I'm looking forward to tomorrow".

Gillian leaned against the doorframe, watching him get into the elevator, shaking his head. He watched her, still quite confused as to what had just taken place.

"What?" she grinned.

He put his hands in his pockets and frowned.

"Nothing".

The doors started to close, and he finally smiled.

* * *

Emily waited patiently, lying on her bed with her eyes closed and carefully tucked in. She was hoping Cal would arrive before she fell asleep, not just to ask him about Gillian, but also because she was still feeling a little uneasy after all the things that had happened in the past few days.

Her phone rang suddenly and startled her. She checked the caller ID and sighed in relief as she saw the name "Dan" flashing on the screen. She picked up.

"Hey, you".

"Hi Em" he responded, sounding weary.

"What's wrong? You sound horrible" she said lovingly, propped up on one elbow against her pillow.

"Yeah, I just got back from the hospital. They're keeping Dad overnight, he's not feeling very well…" he sniffed almost inaudibly.

Emily frowned.

"I'm so sorry… Is there anything I can do now?"

"Not really" he replied. "But thanks. And thanks for picking up at this time of night. I almost didn't call you, but-"

"Hey" she interrupted. "It's alright".

A short silence hung between them and she spoke again.

"You know you can come here if you need to get away for a while" she said. "Plus, last night's dinner plans didn't quite work out, right?" she smiled a little bit.

"Yeah" he chuckled. "Rain-check on that".

"Exactly" Emily sighed. Her phone beeped. "Listen, it's my Dad on the other line, but, if you need anything just call me alright?"

"Sure. Thanks, babe".

Emily laughed and rolled her eyes.

"Sure. Love you, bye".

"Love you too" Dan said before hanging up.

"Hi Dad" Emily greeted with a playful tone.

"Hey kiddo. I'm on my way. Everything okay?"

"Sure" she replied. "What about you? Everything _okay_?" she asked playfully.

"Yeah, 'course" Cal brushed it off. "Be there in ten, okay?"

"Oookay" she raised her eyebrows and pursed her lips. "See you".

"Bye, luv".

Emily walked to the kitchen to get a glass of water, and out of the blue a banging sound came from outside, near the front door. She jumped so high that she almost shot out of her pajamas in the middle of the hallway. Peeping from behind the curtain, she was shocked, to say the least, to find Eli Loker walking up their front steps.

She opened the door with a know-it-all, you're-a-good-for-nothing expression on her face.

"Let me guess" she teased, "you missed my Dad so much that you ran over here as fast as you could and in the process failed to realize that there's a trash can in our front garden".

He rubbed his left foot and gave her a big eyeroll.

"At least the second part's true. Nice to see you too, Emily".

She grimaced, the pathetic image of a man in his late twenties (or early thirties?) rubbing his foot on her doorstep making her feel sorry for him. She opened the door further.

"Come in, Eli. I'll get you some ice".

She walked into the house and came back from the kitchen with an ice pack and her glass of water, to find Loker sprawled out on the couch, looking around the living room.

"Your hair looks pretty" he chipped in as he watched her walk towards him and reach out to give him the pack.

"Um, thanks?" she replied with a half-smile and a frown, sitting opposite him on the armchair. "I mean, I was already going to sleep".

"Oh, I'm sorry. I take it your father's not here?"

"Nope" she answered instantly. "He's coming back from-" she paused for a fraction of a second, not wanting to mention Gillian. "-he's coming back any minute now".

Okay, it was not good enough, she knew that. Eli was smiling suspiciously. But at least she had told him the truth. _Please, let him not ask about what Dad was doing…_

Eli opened his mouth and Emily looked away.

"It's okay. I'll wait for him".

_That was decent, I'll give him that much._

They sat in silence for a while, and merely three minutes later, Cal's car skidded into the driveway. He got out and strode into his dwelling with a huge grin on his face, which swiftly dissolved as he took in the image before him.

Emily, in her pajamas, her hair up in a bun and all messy in places, a sheepish look on her face.

Eli Loker, lounging on his favorite couch, ice pack on his bare foot, beaming happily.

Cal placed his hands on his hips and frowned, mouth slack.

"Hey, boss" Loker chirped.

"Have you even _read_ our work policy?" was all Cal managed to get out.

"Um, okay, I'll see you tomorrow at breakfast, Dad" Emily walked up to him and kissed his cheek. "We'll catch up later".

He nodded absent-mindedly and kept his eyes locked on his employee.

"Is this your idea of responsibility? I'm not going to pay you again just because you're so enthusiastic about a case that you come knocking on my door at 10pm, which by the way is totally inappropriate".

"Relax, Dr. Lightman. I've got good news, and they couldn't wait til tomorrow. I couldn't reach you _or _Dr. Foster on your phones-" he said, emphasizing the coincidence there, "-so I thought I'd drop by. And don't pretend like you're one of those people who actually sleep. I know you don't".

Cal stared at him disbelievingly, and Eli just observed him with a matter-of-fact expression. When Lightman's face relaxed and his frown subsided, the other man smiled again.

"Now, if you would be so kind, I'm going to need something to put my leg up. I think I might have sprained my finger".

"You're a freaking iconoclast" Cal said, resigned, as he turned to go fetch a low stool for Eli. The younger man pulled a face.

"I'm a what?"

Lightman groaned, walking out of the room, and spoke over his shoulder.

"Oh, just look it up in a dictionary, will you?"

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Reviews are always welcome :)


	9. Chapter 8

**Disclaimers: Same as usual, you know the drill.**

**Note: Please, guys, DO REVIEW after you read! Don't make me beg, it's really frustrating to see people adding the story to favorites and not giving an opinion, at least a short line, a few words. Any criticism is welcome. Other writers who read this might now that every review is an inspiration and a motivation for the next piece, and also, when people actually voice what they like or don't like, it helps us writers grow, and I really look forward to hearing what you think every time I write something! =) So, that said, thanks to those who reviewed!! And I hope you enjoy this one, although it's kind of a filler. Necessary to go on, still. Thanks many!!! Love, all.**

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Chapter VIII

"I'm listening" Cal blurted out at the young man sitting on his couch. He took the place recently vacated by Emily, and the fading moonlight shone onto his carefully masked face.

Eli's deep green eyes sparkled with anticipation and a small smile played upon his lips.

"Remember the Channing case?"

Cal raised an eyebrow and lightly sneered.

"Um, rhetorical question" Loker corrected himself. Of course he remembered. Rape cases were Cal's weak spot right after suicides.

"So here's the thing. The Channings' attorney called in about an hour before I left the building. He said the trial is tomorrow and Alice is freaking out-"

"Who's Alice?" Lightman frowned.

"The wife" Eli responded, opening his mouth to continue.

"Wait. What trial?"

"Her husband was accused of rape, that's why we were investigating in the first place" Eli replied with a confused expression. Lightman was not being fully himself.

"I know, I know, but I had no idea the trial was to take place tomorrow!" Cal groaned in exasperation.

"Well" Eli scratched his head. "Actually, that's why she's freaking out. The judge thought that there was no point in postponing it since there was so much evidence standing against the guy".

"But there were no signs of rape, as far as we were told".

"No, but there were signs of struggle inside the girl's house, so he's still up for breaking into private property, plus violence and maybe sexual harassment ."

Cal licked his lower lip and grimaced, scrunching up his nose. He stood up with his hands on his hips.

"I still don't get what the good news is".

"Ah, well, here's where the plot thickens" the younger man grinned. "You know how he kept saying he hadn't done it? And we couldn't see any signs of deception, right?" Cal nodded once. "And the wife was absolutely honest when she said he had always had a thing for younger women, though he'd never been violent towards _her_".

"Yeah, yeah" Lightman waved his hand around as he struggled to remember something. "He assaulted a girl some years ago, nothing major, but still an antecedent, right?"

Loker nodded and clasped his hands together.

"So here's the thing: the guy has an antecedent, he hasn't got an alibi, says he doesn't remember what he was doing that night. The wife really doesn't believe he's guilty, but she doesn't know where he was either. _And_, they've found his fingerprints all over the girl's house. She's in some kind of post-traumatic shock state so we couldn't talk to her, so I guess if she is so shaken up something must have happened in there".

"Sounds like a dead man" Cal half-smiled in resignation.

"_But_" Eli raised his finger with a triumphant smile. "The one person we could not get a hold of last week was Janet's –that's the girl- boyfriend… Who happens to be, drumroll, please-"

"Loker, cut the bullshit" Lightman scowled with a strained look on his face.

"Fine. Who happens to be Dean Channing's nephew, who hates him for some weird inheritance thing, which would make absolutely no sense if we didn't know that this guy's family is now broke. And did I mention he hates his uncle?"

"You did. You know, that's why I never had any brothers or sisters" Cal shrugged.

Loker puckered his lips before answering.

"For some reason I have a feeling that wasn't really your decision".

Cal grinned.

"Eh, anyway, back to the case. What's the good part again?"

"Right. Well. Tomorrow's the trial, and the boy's gonna be speaking against Channing. The wife is very upset and she convinced her attorney that it would be good to have us there".

Lightman looked a bit stunned.

"She thinks-" Eli went on, "-that if we can prove the boyfriend is lying, they might get some more time for us to talk to Janet and see if we can make out what really happened".

"Seriously" Cal started. "Are we going to waste a whole day scrutinizing a teen who obviously holds a grudge against his uncle, just to find that the guy really broke into her house, came onto her and tried to rape her, _even if he didn't_" Cal emphasized, "and then just walked out saying he didn't remember a thing?"

He looked less than satisfied with the course this conversation –and this case- was taking.

"Listen, boss" Loker shook his head. "I really think this guy is innocent. What if he was not in his right mind? What if he has some kind of weird, never before heard of, mind-boggling pathology?"

Cal started to pace across the room.

"No, no, no" he answered at once. "Foster would've noticed".

His confidence in Gillian's skills was really rather amusing. When it came to lies, he was the man, but when it came to the freak department, he trusted Foster like no other.

"I mean it" Loker insisted. "We found absolutely no signs of deception. Channing is telling the truth. Just one day, boss, give me tomorrow and I'll get you the cold hard cash" he grinned boyishly.

"I think I can do that for myself" Cal replied, deviating from the point of the conversation and still looking around the room, never at Loker.

"One day".

"I don't know, Loker. I really think it's rather useless".

"Please".

Cal stopped walking and ran a hand through his hair, sighing. He spun on his heels to face his employee.

"Now, listen to me, cause I will not repeat this, alright?" the boy nodded at Cal's piercing stare, as if he could actually see the older man's mind working at full speed, though of course he couldn't. Nevertheless, he was positively sure that was what the fixed, bright eyes were hiding.

"Foster and I will go to the trial-" Loker opened his mouth to protest and Lightman shushed him with a raise of his hand. "As I said, I will take Foster with me. If there is any pathology or mental -something, that we have missed, she's the one to spot it. As for you, team up with Torres and do what you can to get to the girl".

"But she's not allowed-"

"Oy!" Cal stopped him once again. "You asked for this. And you're not only in _my_ firm, you're now in _my_ house, so do as I say" he finished with a frown, walking right next to Loker and hovering over him.

"Sure" Eli mumbled, looking away. "When in Rome…"

There was a minute or so of silence and Cal finally flopped down onto the armchair again, closing his eyes briefly. Eli yelped in pain and Lightman's eyes opened lazily.

"What happened to you anyway?" he inquired.

"Kicked the trash can in the garden" he answered begrudgingly, knowing that Cal was most likely to make fun of him.

In fact, his boss stifled a chuckle, but ended up being more attentive than Eli had expected.

"Can you walk?" he asked, seeing as Loker was trying to get up to leave.

"I can manage, thanks" he replied, wincing again.

"Did you drive here?"

"Um, no. But I'll get a taxi, I'm fine".

Cal frowned.

"Why would you walk here at this time of the night?"

"I don't actually have a car of my own, so" Eli shrugged, hands up in the air. "No choice, really".

By this time he was already near the door, so Cal stood up to let him out.

"Oh, you have to be at court at-"

"Yeah, yeah" Cal hushed him out. "I'll see you at the office. Thanks. And I don't want to see you here ever again" he added with a smile.

"Roger that. So, you'll tell Foster?"

Eli did not remember, at the time he asked the question, that he had been suspicious of them both for a while now, and especially tonight, given the way things had unfolded. So he was actually surprised when he saw Lightman's face contort ever so slightly at the mention of her name. He couldn't quite put his finger on it, but there had definitely been something there. He didn't usually show emotion, and even if he couldn't distinguish which it had been, since it was too short and he was distracted, his boss had most certainly let something slip.

But Eli knew better than to delve into it. The mask was up again, and Lightman had obviously realized that he had let his guard down for a fraction of a second, and that the young man had seen it, though his searching eyes told him he hadn't been quick enough.

"Yes, I'll let her know first thing tomorrow".

_Liar._

"Okay, then" Eli answered, still thoroughly examining Cal's face, which was now perfectly relaxed.

_Ria's right. He's scary good._

"Go home, Loker" Cal snapped suddenly. Eli gave him one last long, hard look, and turned to leave. As he watched him walk away from behind the curtain, just like Emily had done earlier, he scolded himself for being so smitten about Gillian. But he was certain Loker had not seen enough to be sure about anything.

_And that's why I'm boss. Can't believe he actually tried to read me._

Cal laughed to himself and started walking upstairs, dialing Gillian's number on his cell phone. She picked up at the second ring.

"Cal, is everything okay?" she blurted out.

"Hey, yeah" he sighed. "Did I scare you?"

"No, I mean, it's late, that's all".

He smiled into the phone and stopped at the landing next to Emily's door.

"Yeah, I'm sorry about that. Listen, there's been an update to the Channing case, Loker just told me-"

"Oh, that's why he called-"

"Yup. He showed up at my house" Cal interrupted her and waited for a reaction.

Silence.

"What?"

Cal chuckled.

"Yeah, I'll tell you about it later. As for now" he continued in a sultry voice, "You. Me. Court room. Tomorrow".

He knew Gillian was smiling, and most probably blushing, at the other end of the line.

"Channing's attorney wants us there" he explained. "I'll fill you in tomorrow at the office before we go, okay?"

"Sure" Gillian answered in between yawns.

"Sorry, love" Cal wrinkled his nose and eyebrows. "Go to sleep".

"You too", her answer came in a soft whisper. "It's late".

"I know" he grinned, and held still for a few seconds. "Okay, night" he said finally.

"'Night, Cal".

"Oh, and Gillian" he said in a rush before she hung up.

Another yawn.

"Yes?"

"Dress nicely".

He hung up the phone and stood there motionless, breathing steadily. In a quick but silent movement, he turned to Emily's room and peered into it through the crack in the door. She did not move.

Cal figured if she was not already beside him, asking him if he and Gillian had snogged, then she must really be asleep. He was soon in his room, getting rid of his clothes and ready to get into bed.

He could still hear Gillian's jingling laughter as his head hit the pillow and he fell into a peaceful sleep.

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Sorry it's kinda short. It seemed longer as I was writing it, lol.


	10. Chapter 9

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A/N: I was tempted to finish it off with this chapter since I'm having a lot of trouble coping with my schedule and stuff.... But then I thought, Emily's character has been kinda left out, plus it should be fun to take it from here and see what happens with Cal and Gillian. So I hope you enjoy this chapter!! Thanks to those who reviewed, you make me very happy!

**At the end of the day, I'm really writing for you all!**

**Disc: As usual!**

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Chapter IX

One beep.

Two beeps.

Three beeps.

Gillian Foster stretched her arm over the nightstand to turn the alarm clock off. She instantly let her arm go limp again and hit the mattress, while her head snuggled deeper into the pillow. Her breathing was slow and steady, and her eyelids were still heavy with sleep. She groaned, knowing she'd have to get up soon.

She could still feel Cal's scent on the hair that fell over her face, and was instantly reminded of the night before. It was with equal rapidness that she realized what had actually happened and felt how her whole body reacted to the thought. She had become stiff and was holding her breath, her eyes opening and shifting from one place to another. She was about to have a nervous breakdown, and she knew it.

She jumped out of bed without so much as a whine and headed to the bathroom, where she stripped down to her underwear and let the cold water start running. She barely opened the hot water tap; she needed refreshing. With a quick step, she went back into the bedroom and grabbed her perfume and body lotion, then skidded back into the bathroom.

_What were you thinking, Gillian? Where are you gonna go from here? You must have been crazy. Okay, maybe it's not so bad, but really, what is this supposed to be? You're definitely not "seeing each other", but you're on first name basis-_

She brought herself to a halt, struggling against all the questions that had arisen in her mind within the last few seconds.

_Relax, Gillian, there is no need to treat Cal any differently. _

For some reason, she found this thought comforting and decided to hold on to that as she walked into the shower, unable to stop her head from replaying the whole scene from the previous night. She definitely needed to refresh herself.

* * *

Breathing deeply, she stepped in and tried not to think too much.

"Morning Heidi" Gillian called out to the secretary as she walked in.

"Hello Dr. Foster!" answered the girl. "Dr. Lightman is waiting for you".

Gillian gave her a curt nod and continued, smiling sheepishly at the words. She walked into Cal's office to find him propped up on his elbow, reading a book intently, but with the word boredom written all over his face.

He saw her from the corner of his eye and looked up, open mouthed as always. Then he gave her a slight frown and placed both his hands upon the table, tilting his head to the side in amusement.

"Hi, love" he chuckled. Gillian grinned.

"What's that for?" she inquired, approaching his desk.

"Just appreciating the view. Remind me to take cases like this more often".

Cal did a double-take of Gillian in that flattering navy blue suit that brought out her eyes, and stored it in his memory. A second later he was in business mode again.

"Okay, sit down, Foster" he tapped on the table with his pen and watched her closely. "Here's the thing".

Merely fifteen minutes later, Cal had finished updating her on the Channing case. They were working out some minor details when Gillian actually realized what it was Cal had been reading.

"Cal?"

"What?"

She studied his face thoroughly as she asked the question, a triumphant smile playing on her lips. She gave the book a short glance and fixed her eyes back on him.

"Is that Wuthering Heights?"

Lightman kept his expression neutral –he was a pro after all- but the one thing he couldn't control was the colour that started rising in his ears. When he did not answer immediately, she repeated the question.

"Is it?"

Cal nodded, apparently nonchalant. "It is".

"You're ashamed!" Gillian laughed heartily, grabbing the book before Cal could make a move for it, and looking at the cover. She sighed dramatically. "I love this novel. What do you think about it?"

But Cal was not going to let her win.

"Exactly what I expected. A dramatic story about two very selfish people who could not bring themselves to say they loved each other and be together because they were too caught up in their own misery to actually care about the other person" he replied, waving his hand around.

"Wow" Gillian opened her eyes wide. "When you put it that way, it does take away all its charm".

"They're all the same, love" Cal shrugged it off, wrinkling his nose in disgust.

"Well, you did seem pretty interested when I walked in" she retorted.

"Of course I was", he answered cheekily, looking her up and down.

They both burst out laughing, and as it subsided, Cal's eyes softly rested on Gillian's face. He leaned over the desk and took her hand in his, not breaking eye contact. She felt how her entire body responded to his touch, and smiled.

"I knew it!" came Loker's voice from the threshold. Gillian withdrew her hand and knocked over one of Cal's ornaments from India or whatever place it was. She looked apologetically at Cal, who was looking at Loker, and showed no signs of surprise or shame or regret on his face. In fact, she dared say he didn't care that Eli had seen them holding hands, not at all.

"Knew what?" he asked with his trademark neutral expression. He was thrilled that Loker kept trying to read him. When it did not annoy him, Cal really got a kick out of it.

"You two" Loker answered, pointing at one and then the other, his eyes shifting from Cal to Gillian and back again. "You're doing it".

A great smile spread across his features and Cal frowned. Gillian couldn't help a little laugh as she heard him. She rolled her eyes and stood up, her arms at her sides.

"Yeah" Cal answered. "It's usually called working".

Eli's smile widened and he continued, "Oh, no, you're _doing it _doing it".

Cal rose to his feet and dawdled up to Loker, scrutinizing him, his head swaying from side to side.

"Hiring you was just one big waste of my time, wasn't it?" he asked, emphasizing every word.

Eli opened his mouth but Lightman interrupted him.

"Really, Loker. Save me the trouble. Shut up".

Loker pursed his lips and gave him a fake smile, then blew the air out before he started with what he really wanted to say.

"Got a call from the people at court. They're pushing the schedule half an hour, they cannot find Channing".

"Which one of 'em?" Cal asked, eyebrows up in exasperation.

"The husband".

"Oh. Do they need us to look for him?" came the second question, followed by the wrinkling of his nose and a crooked grimace.

"No" Loker shook his head. "They just want you there in time. If anything weird comes up, they'll call you".

"Good" Lightman nodded. Then he looked at Gillian, who was still standing in the same spot, arms crossed over her chest. He pointed at her and beckoned with his finger. "Come on".

Gillian followed after him, though she was not sure where he was heading to. Loker walked out behind them.

"Hey! Since you guys have an extra half hour-"

"We don't" Cal shouted over his shoulder. "Keep up, Foster" he said to Gillian, who was a few steps back, flashing her a short, real grin.

Gillian sprinted along, catching up with him in a second, not arguing or asking what they were doing. She only looked at him with questioning eyes, but her amused smile told him she was up for whatever it was.

Once out of the building, she walked over to Cal's car, parked near the entrance.

"Oh no, no" he said, passing her by. "We're walking".

Then he turned to look at her, walking backwards.

"Oy, come on! I want to show you something".

Her confused expression was swiftly replaced by intrigue. She shrugged and caught up with him again.

"Where are we going?"

"Well, as far as I know, the Superior Court is our final destination. The rest is a surprise".

"Um, okay" Gillian answered, unsure. Cal caught the hesitation in her voice and slowed down his pace.

"You okay, love?" he looked at her from the corner of his eye.

"Yup".

"What is it?"

"Honestly?"

"If you want to. You know I'll know if you're lying. But I promise I won't push" he teased, a small smile forming in the corner of his lips.

She sighed and pouted slightly.

"I'm already having trouble taking this all in. I mean, what are we doing? What are the boundaries? I'm- I…"

Cal looked at her as they walked. "We're getting to know each other on a different level".

She looked at him sternly and continued.

"Seriously, Cal, don't we already know each other quite well? It's not like we can hide many things from one another".

"Yeah, yeah" he shrugged it off. "It's really no big deal, love. I'm not sure that labeling whatever we're doing is gonna make it any easier. It might even make it harder". And then he concluded, "Let's just take it easy and see where it goes, okay?"

"Yeah" Gillian breathed out softly. "I guess that's what I wanted to tell you. I just don't want to rush this, you know… I was afraid you'd just feel the need to ask me everything you've never asked me from one day to another".

"Nah" Cal shook his head. "Not going there". Their eyes met for a short moment and he saw the relief sweeping over Gillian's face. "I mean it. Let's pretend we're in high school. No deep dark secrets until we're all grown up".

Gillian laughed genuinely and flipped her hair to the side.

"Are you flirting with me?" Cal asked her with a playful tone.

"What? No" she replied, still giggling.

"The high school thing was figurative, yeah?"

"I know, Cal".

"Doesn't show".

"Will you stop it?" Gillian giggled once more.

"You're like a flirty 16 year old, tossing your hair to the sides and giggling like crazy" he said with apparent disbelief. "And now you're blushing".

"Okay, Cal, that's it" she said in the most serious tone she could manage.

He stopped walking and faced her, eyes sparkling.

"Fine. Favourite colour?"

"Are we really doing this?" Gillian answered as Cal led her towards a small park across the street.

"Yeah. Go on".

"Okay. White".

"White? That's not a colour!"

"Of course it is!"

"Wouldn't white be the absence of colour?"

"Honestly, Cal? Are you for real?" Gillian smiled her pearl white smile.

"Nah, I'm just making a huge fuss of it, like teenagers do" he grinned. Gillian stared at him in resignation. "Okay, so, white".

"Yes, white. What's yours?"

"Orange" he replied without even thinking about it.

"Orange?" Gillian's voice was laced with incredulity.

Cal looked at her seriously. "That's a colour".

"I know, I just thought you'd say black, or something of the sort".

"Aye, just because people see me as an alienating son of a bitch doesn't mean everything about me is depressing. You should know that".

Cal spotted a bench near them and started walking towards it, but all of a sudden he halted.

"Favourite ice-cream?"

"Praline pecan and vanilla fudge ripple" Gillian answered, beaming at him like a young child. He loved how she would get excited over these little things, and it was exactly why he found it so interesting to make all these questions.

"Great" he answered, taking her hand and tugging her along after him.

"Cal?" Gillian called, looking disoriented. Then she found herself trotting across the street to the ice-cream store right behind Cal. He looked at her and winked, and Gillian could not help but feel touched by the gesture. Cal really had a way with her.

As they walked away from the store barely five minutes later, Cal started teasing her about choosing weird flavors.

"What's weird about praline pecan?" Gillian asked with a smile.

"I don't know. I just think it's better to go with plain vanilla".

"And now, see, I never would've thought of you as conservative" she teased, sitting down on the bench they had seen earlier. She started licking the cone idly.

"And I never would've thought ice-cream could look so sexy" he retorted, making her freeze mid-action. She gave him a warning look and leaned back, eyeing him suspiciously as he grinned widely. "No, I mean it".

"Mm hmm" she replied, sucking on the tip of the ice-cream with deliberate slow movements.

Cal pointed to the corner of her lip.

"You gonna take care of that, love?" he smiled crookedly.

Gillian watched him as his eyes wandered over to her lips, his mouth opening slightly.

"No".

He leaned in slowly. When his lips were only inches away from hers, she held up a finger and in one quick move wiped the cream off her lower lip, gently sucking it off the tip of her finger with an innocent look in her eyes.

Cal snorted and moved back.

"How's that for going slow, eh?"

Gillian laughed and pulled back a little, observing Cal closely.

"Seriously. I have just decided, we have to make up some rules".

She let her eyes open in surprise and then frowned.

"Rules?" she repeated. "We're going to have rules, Cal?"

"Why, you're very fond of rules, love" he replied.

"Well, yes, but not here, I mean sure we should sort out some stuff, but we just said-"

"Listen" he interrupted. "It's more like… The limits and bonuses of this game. But the great part is, nobody has to win".

Gillian stared at him for a while. He shrugged and put his hands in his pockets.

"And we can make them up as we go. For example, you can't tease me like that unless you're positive I'm gonna get some later".

"Cal!" Gillian started in a tone of warning, but couldn't help the smile creeping up her face.

He beamed at her, then stood up and reached out with his hand for her to join him. She took it gladly, straightening herself up and standing beside him. But when she tried to let go, he just tugged at her again and started to walk in the direction of the Superior Court.

"Oh, so this is how it's gonna go?"

"If you want".

"What's happening to you?"

"What do you mean?"

"What's up with all the "if you wants" and stuff? Aren't you going to boss me around on how to handle this relationship?"

He turned to her, idly stroking the back of her hand with his thumb, and licked his lower lip.

"Haven't I already?"


	11. Chapter 10

**Disclaimers: **The usual!! See previous chapters.

**Note: **Thank you all those who reviewed and I'm sorry for the wait. I definitely haven't given up on this story, I'm just living a pretty crazy lifestyle this year, as I'm not living with my family anymore, so I ask you to please bear with me :D ALSO, IMPORTANT WARNING: This story had earned its rating because of adult themes and maybe vocabulary, but so far we'd had none of that. This chapter does. So you know what you're facing, lol. Enjoy!!!! Reviews are love! =)

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**Chapter X**

A week gone by, three successfully closed cases and a glass of scotch later, Gillian sat with her feet curled up under her body, leaning against the back of the couch with a content smile on her face. Cal was watching her from the other side of the sofa, his mouth slack, his eyes wandering over her face.

"What, Cal?" she asked as she flipped through the pages of her book.

"What what?"

"You're staring".

He snorted, but didn't reply.

"I know there's something you're not telling me" she smirked. Without looking up, she paused and licked her finger, then turned another page.

"What are you reading anyway?" he asked, his tongue slightly sticking out.

Gillian heard genuine interest in his voice, which forced her to stop reading. She lifted her gaze and observed him, surprised.

He cocked his head to the side and raised his eyebrows. "Go on, then".

Cal rested his arm along the back of the couch, and Gillian sighed lightly.

"It's Katherine Mansfield" she stopped short and considered a thought. "In fact, she's a writer you might actually enjoy. She's you in a woman's body".

She grinned, he frowned.

"It's not a happy romance novel, then?" he inquired.

"Nope".

"And she doesn't write about phony couples?"

"Actually, she does".

Cal gave her an expression of mixed disgust and contempt, which was obviously not directed at her but at the thought of "phony couples". Gillian laughed and held up her hand.

"No, wait-" she started. "It's not what you're thinking". She shook her head, remainders of her laughter still escaping her lips.

Cal scooted in closer to her and turned, lying down against her lap, his head resting on the arm of the couch and his feet propped up on the other side. He intertwined his fingers and placed his hands over his stomach.

"Surprise me, Foster" he drawled in his thick, heavy accent. She smiled and ran her fingers through his hair as she took a deep breath and cleared her throat.

"_What can you do-"_

Cal coughed loudly and held up a hand apologetically as the other one covered his mouth. She waited, still stroking his hair, and after a few seconds he motioned for her to go on.

"_What can you do if you are thirty and, turning the corner of your own street, you are overcome, suddenly by a feeling of bliss - absolute bliss! –", _Gillian recited in a soft voice,_ "as though you'd suddenly swallowed a bright piece of that late afternoon sun and it burned in your bosom, sending out a little shower of sparks into every particle, into every finger and toe? ..._"

"That's so you" Cal scoffed.

"Hey!" Gillian protested. "Don't interrupt me!"

"I'm sorry, love, but I have never felt like I'd swallowed a piece of sun" he chuckled, mocking her.

"I'll pretend you didn't say that" she replied, and gently twirled the hair on the back of his head between her fingers. Then she continued. "_Oh, is there no way you can express it without being "drunk and disorderly"? How idiotic civilisation is! Why be given a body if you have to keep it shut up in a case like a rare, rare fiddle? "No, that about the fiddle is not quite what I mean," she thought..._"

Cal listened to her in quiet fascination, though he would never admit to it. The passion with which she pronounced every single word actually made him want to read something other than research, legal documents and reports.

He idly ran his fingers along her leg, making small circles and swirling lines, his eyes fixed on a blank spot on the wall in front of him while he listened attentively.

Eventually, he closed his eyes and concentrated on her voice, how the words seemed to fall from her lips gracefully, how the Rs rolled off her tongue and the Ss made a sibilant sound, almost like the whistling of the wind.

Gillian made a short pause and looked at him from the corner of her eye. She saw that he was breathing slowly, and he looked peaceful, his face showing no expression at all other than a pleased little smile playing on his lips.

"_For the dark table seemed to melt into the dusky light and the glass dish and the blue bowl to float in the air. This, of course, in her present mood, was so incredibly beautiful ... She began to laugh_."

She paused again, a little longer this time.

"Her laughter woke up the dog, Barney, and it started barking loudly. This made her so angry that she threw the blue bowl at the animal, though she missed it for an inch".

Cal's eyes shot open.

"Oy!" he frowned. "What dog?"

"Oh!" Gillian laughed, taken by surprise. Her eyes twinkled.

"I **was** listening to you!" he complained in a high pitched voice.

"I'm sorry" she said in between giggles. "I thought you'd fallen asleep".

Cal looked up at her, his expression something in between happiness and disbelief. They held each other's gaze for a moment.

"Barney?" he frowned. "Completely spoiled the mood, Foster. You actually had me hooked for a moment".

"I told you you'd like her!" Gillian smiled triumphantly.

"Yeah, well, now I'll have to read it again without thinking about the bloody dog" he whined as he pulled himself up with both hands and stood beside her.

She closed the book with a grin and observed him. He was not _that_ upset.

She could tell he was debating whether to fill her in on what was going on, or not. His hands went into his pockets and he turned to look squarely back at her.

"A friend of mine called" he blurted out.

"Oh?"

"He needs help with a case" he cut himself short, not really sure how to say this.

Gillian placed the book on the couch beside her feet, tilting her head to the side.

"_And?_" she probed.

"It's in London".

She froze for a second, then shifted her position.

"What do you mean, in London? Can't we work from here?"

He shook his head.

"No. Believe me, I insisted that it was not necessary for us to go up there, but-"

"But what? You mean you already took the case?" her eyes went wide and her eyebrows furrowed.

He ran a hand through his hair, agitated.

"No. Not exactly. But he and I go way back, and I feel like I owe it to him".

"Since when do you owe anything to anyone, Cal Lightman?"

"I just do, okay?" he replied quickly, his face becoming neutral, though Gillian could see a hint of annoyance. Then he relaxed. "Listen, if you do not object, you and I go up there for a week at the most. He will put us up and if we don't solve whatever it is in a seven day period, we come back and that's it".

She remained silent for a few seconds, and he sat down beside her.

Wagging his eyebrows, he continued, "I promise it'll be fun".

"Shut up, Cal".

She shoved him gently, biting her lip as she tried to conceal a smile –but to no avail.

After a moments' silence, she looked back at him.

"What about Torres and Loker?"

"Short cases, catching up on reports, and telling anyone else that we're on hiatus for ten days", he explained nonchalantly, swirling his hand around.

"Sounds like you got it covered" Gillian answered. Then there was a thought in her eyes. She shifted again on the couch to face him. "Ten days?" He didn't even flinch. "You said a week, Cal".

His mouth was hanging open and he cocked his head to the side to examine her.

"It's the same".

A small smile played upon Gillian's lips as she tried to read his impassive face.

"You planned all this, didn't you?"

Cal pouted.

"So?"

"What was that? Some kind of trick to see how well I could read you?"

Cal gave her a half crooked smile.

"Truth is, love, you can't read me. I just let you. Which doesn't mean you'll always be able to".

He raised his eyebrows in amusement at her silent response.

Gillian sighed. "Is there really a case anyway?"

"Oh", Cal started, "'course there is. I just thought since we were at it we could take a few days, you know, us two".

She frowned, then leaned back and propped her feet up on Cal's lap, crossing her arms over her chest.

"Okay" she shrugged.

He leaned in and gave her a soft, quick kiss.

"Good, 'cause I've already got the plane tickets".

"You're terrible. Do you ever consider my opinion on things?"

He lay down beside her, wrapping his arms around her waist and spooning up behind. He kissed the back of her neck and pulled her closer.

"Can't say I do, love" he teased.

Gillian shook her head and smiled, resigned.

"I'm not sure how I should respond to that".

"I have a few ideas in mind…"

Cal's hand moved up the hem of her shirt and he traced his thumb along the curve of her hips and up to her waist, gently nibbling on her earlobe.

Gillian cocked her head to the side to give him better access, a pleased hum reverberating in her throat.

Then she turned around and put her arms around Cal's neck, looking into his eyes.

"As good as this feels… I think we should save our energies" she whispered seductively. Cal groaned. "For London, I mean".

Cal snorted and pressed his mouth to her shoulder. "I know exactly what you mean, Foster, and you're not talking about the case" he told her as his kisses traveled up her skin until they found her lips.

She pulled away for a second.

"What makes you think I'm not?" she asked innocently.

He smiled smugly.

"Your face is flushed, your ears are burning, and your leg is wrapped around mine. In other words, you want me".

She cut her eyes at him, though her expression was that of amusement.

"Well" she started. "I think you're not in much of a position to talk".

She boldly pressed herself against him, feeling the growing bulge in his jeans, and grinned.

"Touché".

Cal looked like the air had been sucked out of his lungs.

"This is unfair" he blurted out.

"How so?"

"You can't leave me like this" he said in an almost pleading tone.

The doorbell rang. Gillian raised an eyebrow, then sighed dramatically.

"Looks like I have no choice".

She kissed him again before getting up off the couch. Cal moaned in disappointment and sat up, while he watched Gillian walk over to the front door, swinging her hips deliberately with each long step.

This was going to be harder than he thought.


	12. Chapter 11

**Disclaimers: **same as usual!

**Notes: **Thanks for all the lovely reviews, and I'm sorry for the delay, my computer crashed and I only managed to put this on LJ last Saturday cause a friend lent me her computer... As my luck would have it, was down at that time and I only got my computer back yesterday, so here it is!! I particularly enjoyed writing this chapter so I hope you'll like it. As for the one coming up right after this one, it might be NC-17. I don't remember what the site policy is on this, so if I am not allowed to post that here, I might leave you a note to alert you when I update on the next chapter and a link to my LJ. I'll see what I do. So anyway! Hope you like it!!! :D Reviews are love.

OH! And by the way, to avoid any misinterpretation: wankered=knackered. Same thing. ;)

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**Chapter XI**

"Oy! Torres!" Cal yelled from across the hallway.

Ria spun on her heels and stood motionless, watching her boss hobble up to where she was. She grimaced.

"Are your shoes too tight or something?"

Cal stood in front of her, slouching his shoulders, and tilted his head.

"What?" he breathed out in exasperation.

Ria shook her head, as if to shake a thought from her mind.

"Nothing. What's up?"

He observed her for a long moment and straightened up, widening his eyes.

"Is everything ready?" He paused only for a second before interrupting whatever she was about to say. "And by ready, I mean under control. I don't want to have you calling in the middle of the week, crying because you cannot tell whether-"

"Hi, dad!" Emily's voice rang in his ears and he looked over his shoulder, his finger still pointed at Ria, whose shoulders relaxed slightly as he turned around.

"Hey, Em" he replied, turning fully to face her. He draped his arm around her and pulled her in to kiss the top of her head. "What are you doing here?"

"I…"

"Uh oh" Cal raised his eyebrows, sensing that there was something coming up. Emily had a look of confusion mixed with resignation on her face, and for once he was not sure if he was ready to hear what the problem was.

Emily stared at him, examining his reaction, and sighed.

"Just -girl stuff, you don't want to know" she said, stealing a glance at Ria, who smiled understandingly. Then she looked back at Cal. "I really need to talk to Gillian. She here?"

"Yeah, in her office, love" he replied, pointing to the other end of the hallway. Emily started walking and he hesitated. "Uh, Em?" She turned around as Ria glanced at the clock on the wall. They still had an hour's worth of antsy Lightman to endure.

"Yeah?" Emily's eyes were big and expectant, as usual.

"You ok?" he asked.

"Sure, dad. Don't worry. I'll see you later!" she smiled and waved at him as she made a bee-line to Gillian's office.

Cal faced Ria again, and the small smile he'd given Emily dissolved quickly.

"So, do you oliver?"

Torres eyed him suspiciously.

"I- what?"

"Oh, nothing. Just make sure everything's ready before we leave. I mean it-" he held up a hand, again interrupting her before she had a chance to reply. "-No phone calls. Unless it is paramount business," he waved his hand around, "but that's really for me to decide, so really, no phone calls".

Ria nodded. "Got it. No phone".

"Good". Cal watched her and nodded too. "Good" he repeated.

Then he cocked his head to the side and leaned in slightly, examining her thoroughly.

"Date tonight?"

"What?" she looked up and frowned in confusion. "No, why?"

"You seem pretty apprehensive about time" he said, putting his hands in his pockets.

Ria couldn't help the way her eyes darted to the clock again.

"Loker's waiting for me, that's all".

Cal's face inched closer to hers and he smiled.

"You want me to leave". The corners of her lips twitched ever so slightly. "That's it, isn't it?" Her face became flushed and Cal took a step back, vacating her bubble of personal space.

"Well it's your lucky week then, Torres. Let's see how much you can do without us. You might even impress me".

After a few seconds, he moved past her and then turned, walking backwards to look at her.

"Aye" he pointed at her and motioned with his hand, "follow me".

Ria sprinted after him, watching him as he quickly shuffled forward, his arms swinging beside him, taking up way too much space. She sometimes wondered if he had always walked like that: his body slightly leaning forward, his feet taking long steps, his eyes fixed on whatever was his objective. She had also noticed that when he was angry, or anxious, he often looked like a predator chasing his prey, with no doubt in his mind that he would succeed.

And then, there were times like these: getting a "follow me" from Cal Lightman could mean absolutely _anything_.

Lightman stopped short at the door of the lab, where Loker was playing a video of a woman in her early thirties. She was fairly pretty, and Eli was rewinding and replaying over and over again a part in which she looked particularly embarrassed. There was an amused grin on his face as he observed carefully.

They walked in and Ria sighed in resignation as Loker failed to realize his boss was standing right behind him, and exclaimed: "Torres, you've _got_ to see this. It's hilarious!"

Cal rolled his eyes and stepped in front of him, checking his watch. Then he stared at Eli.

"Do you think I should wear a tie to my meeting tomorrow?"

Eli chuckled.

"What? Why?"

Cal smiled smugly. "Exactly. We don't have time for nonsense. So will you stop piddling about and get to work?"

"Sure, sir" Loker replied with his best poker face.

Cal's eyes shifted back and forth between one and the other, secretly wondering why the hell he had left them in charge, and hoping they wouldn't do anything stupid. Of course, he always had his computer; but this time Foster wouldn't be at the office but with him, and as good as it sounded he was afraid that both heads of the company traveling at the same time would mean chaos for the ones staying. He was starting to think London was a bad idea, so he decided to push the subject to the back of his head.

He put his hands in his pockets and licked his lower lip, frowning. Then he raised his eyebrows and nodded.

"Okay, then. Go on".

As he was walking out of the lab he looked over his shoulder, and with just a hint of sarcasm in his voice, directed himself to Loker.

"Make me proud".

There was a moment of silence and Loker swiveled in his chair, throwing his head back to see Ria.

"Was that what I thought it was?"

She examined his upside-down face, and crossed her arms over her chest.

"Yeah". Another silence, and then Torres walked over to the chair next to his, sitting down and frowning, her eyes fixed on the frozen image on the screen.

"What's that?" Loker asked her, propping his feet up on the table and stretching out.

"What does oliver mean?"

Loker hesitated before answering.

"Well, as far as I know, that's a common name for boys".

"No, no" she shook her head. "Lightman said to me, 'Do you oliver?' What's that supposed to mean?"

"Oh" he laughed, straightening up. "Yeah. That's common slang. As in, do you understand? Lightman uses it every now and then".

Ria held his gaze for a while.

"Huh. I see", she mumbled. "Why oliver?"

"Cromwell" Loker smiled, then looked at the screen in front of him. "Shall we?"

Torres leaned back in her chair and stretched her arms up.

"Yeah".

This was going to be a long week.

* * *

Emily knocked her fingers lightly against the glass doors. Gillian looked up from her papers and smiled wholeheartedly, waving the girl in.

"Hey, Em!" she greeted, leaning back to rest against her chair.

"Hi, Gillian" Emily grinned and sat on the chair opposite hers, propping herself up on her elbows against the desk. "Are you busy?"

"Not really, no" Gillian replied with a slight tilt of her head. "How are you? I hadn't seen you in a while".

"True that" her eyes went wide as she nodded. "School's been crazy, with everything that happened last month, everyone's still a little... You know".

"Yeah" the older woman nodded along, her soft gaze posing on Emily's. "I know".

She could see that something was bugging Emily, but she let it go. There was a reason why Cal's daughter was here and by the looks of it, she was going to let Gillian know about it soon enough.

"Anyway-" she started. "Do you mind if I talk to you about something? I really don't think telling my mom is a very good idea".

"Uh, sure" Gillian answered, though a little taken aback by the fact that Em would choose to talk to her rather than her mother or a friend. Which also made her think that it wasn't just teenager stuff she wanted to chat about.

Emily shook her head and sighed, crossing her arms over her chest.

"I broke up with Dan. His father- he has cancer, and that's got Dan acting really weird". She paused for a moment. "And I know I should be there for him if I really care about him, I talked about that with dad".

Emily shot Gillian a knowing look, and Foster smiled shyly, touched by the image of Cal giving his daughter some advice other than not eating meat that can't be seen.

"I really do care" she continued, "and I want to be there for him. But it just doesn't feel like he wants to be with me anymore".

"Oh. Wow, well-" Gillian sighed. "Did you talk to him about it before you made the decision?" she asked quietly.

"Yeah. And I mean, I thought we were good, but then everything just went back to not speaking to each other, him not wanting to talk to me about any of it... I just-"

"Got tired of trying" Foster completed her sentence, choosing her words carefully.

Emily glanced at her.

"Yup".

Silence.

"Do you think I made the right decision?"

Gillian crossed her legs and stared up at the ceiling, then looked back at Emily.

"Do you think you've done everything that could be done?"

"Positive".

"And the situation was still making you feel bad?"

"Yeah".

"Then, yes. I think you did the right thing" Gillian concluded, a little more than surprised that Emily's relationship with her boyfriend was, after all, so alike her and Alec's in some way.

She gave her an understanding smile, but then a thought crossed Emily's eyes and her eyebrows pushed against her forehead with sadness.

"Hey, are you okay?" Gillian leaned forward and reached out to touch her hand, now resting on top of her desk.

Emily pursed her lips.

"I'm just scared that he might turn to partying, or drugs, or... whatever, you know?"

She froze for a moment, instinctively withdrawing her hand from the young girl's. Then she collected herself and, settling back into her chair, looked down with a sigh.

She was battling with her own thoughts. What kind of advice was she supposed to give a teenager about such things as illness, separation and drugs? Especially when she had gone through all those things. One could only be objective up to a certain point.

She knew she had been there for Alec. She hadn't left him. She had only left when neither her mind nor her body -nor her heart- could take it anymore. Up to that point, she had always felt somewhat responsible for Alec's drug use, like she somehow owed it to him and it was her obligation as a wife to take care of him... But there were so many other things to be considered; and it had been too much.

But how could she tell Emily all this? The truth was she couldn't, really. And she couldn't tell her to take care of Dan by herself. God forbid that someone so young, let alone Emily, should have to go through something like that at such an early age.

She tried not to let her feelings get in the way, even knowing that Cal would kill her if he heard her. But she just couldn't leave Emily hanging, and she had already made it clear that she wouldn't talk to Zoe about it.

"Well" she started, a little hesitant. Emily's expectant eyes were piercing into her. "Keep a close distance, if you want to make sure that he's coping alright" she nodded. "But don't get too involved. Cause if anything happens, you'll only be caught in the middle, and that almost never turns out fine".

With as much confidence as she could muster, she added:

"And don't take responsibility for anything he does. You did your part. Do not blame yourself for anything. If he falls into any kind of vice or does anything... extreme, well, that doesn't mean you did something wrong. Maybe he needs help from someone more experienced, someone-"

"-like you" Emily said, obviously referring to Gillian's occupation, not the woman per se.

"Exactly".

The two stared at each other for a long moment, sharing an understanding look in the quietness of Gillian's room.

"What's all that schmozzle?" Cal asked with a playful grin as he walked in on them all of a sudden.

Emily smiled and looked at Gillian from the corner of her eye. The way she was looking at her dad made it so obvious that they were seeing each other. Her eyes sparkled and her smile widened to at least twice its normal size.

"Not much" she replied, turning back to Cal. "Just having a lighthearted conversation. Girl stuff, as I told you".

"Pickles!" Cal snorted. "I know you're conspiring against me".

Gillian laughed and shook her head, and he approached, sitting on the arm of Emily's chair. He ran his hand through her curls and then put his arm around her shoulders, pulling her close.

"Is your mom picking you up?"

"Yup" she replied. "I called her on my way here".

"Good" he said, glancing at Gillian. "What about you, Foster? Need a ride home?"

"Actually, I might take you up on that offer" she said. "I walked here today".

It was a terrible lie. Of course she had come in with Cal, but Emily wasn't supposed to know. Or anyone in the office, for that matter. Gillian knew that Cal didn't really care, but he was testing her, seeing how far she could get without telling the truth –or anyone spotting her lies. It was a challenge for both of them, and it made everything a lot more fun.

About an hour later, Gillian was fastening her seatbelt in Cal's car, both headed to his place.

"What did you think about this Catherine Graham?" he asked, referring to the woman Loker had been ivestigating today.

"Awful liar. And you stared way too much" she said with a pinch of jealousy.

Cal scoffed.

"Seriously? That fake, plazzy excuse for a lady?" He shook his head. "I'd rather have you any day, love".

Gillian blushed slightly and ran a hand through his hair, watching him as he drove.

"So, do I get to play touchy touchy to-night?" he asked, wagging his eyebrows.

"No" she dead-panned.

He looked at her in mock desperation and then kissed the back of her hand.

"Too bad" he said. "I'm wankered, though. So that's good".

Gillian laughed and relaxed against her seat, glad that her bags were waiting for her at Cal's place, and at least for now, she had nothing to worry about.


	13. IMPORTANT NOTE!

**HELLO EVERYONE!!** Now this is REALLY important and I need you all to bear with me... I am very sorry that I have failed to update this story regularly. I'd hoped I would be able to, but at the time when I started writing, I was living alone in the city, away from my family and friends, away from all the things that I used to do that consumed almost all of my time. About a month ago I decided to go on hiatus on LJ since I really needed to study for finals, so I put my story on hold too. I haven't even had time to read any of the stories I'd been following. Now I am back in my hometown for the holidays (it's summer break down here) and truth is, lots of things have happened, some awesome, but for the most, real crappy stuff. My family and friends and all these things have made it impossible for me to actually write anything decent (other than what I had started writing while I studied for finals).

I am going on vacation tomorrow to a place where the internet connection is next to none. I will do my best to get inspired while I appreciate the nature, etc and write on my laptop so that I can post when I get online, but I can not promise anything because things have been really unstable lately so I don't want to make promises that I cannot keep.

I apologize again for leaving you all hanging, I know it's crap when people do that to a story you're into. I'm really sorry. I will not leave the story unfinished, I just haven't decided when I will post next (and really it's not up to me, my muse has fallen off the face of the Earth).

Thanks again for understanding! I will hopefully see you all again soon.

Rose


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